New Harry Potter Film Full of Drugs, Sex and Rock and Roll

Funny story written by Sophie Jayne

Wednesday, 9 July 2008

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Harry Potter snorts cocaine to get him through the day

I was under the illusion that although the highly popular Harry Potter books did feature a hell of a lot of dark magic and unsavoury characters, it was a children's book series and therefore the film interpretation of it would be suitable for your average seven year old.

However, according to 18-year-old Daniel Radcliffe, the highly-anticipated Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince could easily be a 15 certificate if not an 18!

"There's a fair amount of sexual energy and drug parallels," Radders explained. "It just seemed unrealistic to us that these teens wouldn't have a quick shag after a busy day of saving the wizarding world, and it was obvious that Harry would at least snort coke to get himself through each day."

Director David Yates even went as far to compare it to 'Trainspotting'- a controversial Scottish movie about heroin addicts.

If I was the concerned type, I would urge the film makers to think of the children! But as it is I couldn't give a dam about the kids, i just can't wait to see Ron Weasley dealing drugs or a Ginny/Harry sex scene.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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