William Shatner comments on presidential race, endorses self

Funny story written by Steve Shives

Wednesday, 6 February 2008

LOS ANGELES - Emmy-winner, Star Trek's original Captain Kirk, William Shatner weighed in on the ongoing race for the White House, wishing all candidates in both parties luck, and going on record to endorse himself.

"Let me make this clear," Shatner told reporters attending a press conference called by the actor in his living room this morning, "I am not a candidate for president. I am not running for anything. I only want to make it clear to all the voters, that if they are not happy with any of the current candidates, I will happily accept their votes, and if elected I will serve in the office to the best of my ability."

Speculation as to the composition of a Shatner administration has been varied. Some insist the science fiction icon would turn to fellow Star Trek cast members to serve in prominent cabinet positions, perhaps even tapping Leonard Nimoy, known to attendees of fan conventions worldwide as Enterprise Science Officer Mr. Spock, as vice president. Others cite Shatner's well-known unpopularity with his former Trek castmates as an indication he would turn to a more recent colleague, such as his Boston Legal co-star James Spader, or friend and recent musical collaborator Ben Folds.

The 76 year-old former star of T.J. Hooker promised, if elected, to spend the eleven weeks between Election Day and Inauguration Day campaigning for an amendment to the U.S. Constitution that would allow him, a natural-born Canadian, to assume the presidency.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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