Do Not Add Gravel To Recipe For American Stew

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Wednesday, 17 September 2025

image for Do Not Add Gravel To Recipe For American Stew
Is it American stew or Beef Bourguignon?

Winter is coming, and one of the best suppers is American stew or Beef Bourguignon, as the French call it. It's the same thing. You can start with a tough cut of beef (it's going to cook for a day and eventually gets tender), OR you can buy a round steak and have the butcher cut it up into cubes, if you want to save time.

Salt and pepper the cubes of meat, then coat them with flour. Brown the meat it in a huge pot using olive oil, and once brown, take the meat out and add chopped onions, carrots, potatoes, parsley, other stuff that might be in the frig like celery, left over cranberries, save mushrooms until later, add a can or two of chopped tomatoes, return the browned beef to the pot, then add beef broth or vegetable broth to cover, but Jesus Christ, don't throw in any gravel

Gravel breaks teeth and doesn't enrich the American stew, or the Beef Bourguignon, as the French call it. Adding gravel is like adding hatred. There are many things to hate like lies, sickness, war, and genocide. But don't hate the liar, hate the lie. Unless the liar causes the plague, war, or genocide.

Getting back to the American stew, or the Beef Bourguignon: If you're busy cooking up your own stew or life, what difference does it make if someone else has a different recipe? Stop meddling in the lives of others, complaining, "They aren't using my recipe." 

They have a different taste. They're living their own recipe. It is their inalienable right.

Last ingredient for the American stew? Some excellent Burgundy wine, as the French like to do in their Beef Bourguignon.

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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