Presenting his image as a persecuted presidential candidate, crushed by 37 counts of a Federal Indictment, Donald Trump has commissioned one of his Mar-a-Lago carpenters to construct a ten-foot cross that he plans to carry on his shoulder to all of his campaign rallies.
Carrying the cross, Trump intends to assume the figure of a persecuted Jesus Christ being crucified on his cross by the savage, un-American, deep state, witch hunting, woke-fanatic Democrats.
"Way to go!" agreed his MAGA cronies. "Who's going to criticize J. Christ-Trump? Democrats will be called today's Adolf Hitlers."
Someone corrected, "You mean Pontius Pilates."
An argument followed, then a fistfight. The Secret Service attempted to quell the brawl, but chairs were already flying. The disturbance continued until Trump was called in to settle the turmoil.
He allegedly addressed the group of men, saying, "Ladies, ladies, your panties are showing. Get off the rag. Adolf Hitler, Pontius Pilate, Joe Biden, Hillary-lock-her-up-Clinton, who cares? This cross of mine will give me the White House again for four more years! Four more years." The chant began…
Bringing to mind the Carol Burnett curtain rod attached to the dress made of curtain fabrics in her TV show's Gone With The Wind segment, the authentic cross made for Donald Trump out of a freshly cut redwood tree had green branch stubs still attached.
Placed on his shoulder, Trump collapsed under the weight. He was pinned to the floor for several minutes, but once removed, Trump scrambled to his feet, and mumbled, "I can't carry that son-of-a-b----h anywhere."
To be continued…
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