The Russian heavy metal all-girl band says Trump once made foursome request

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 5 May 2023

image for The Russian heavy metal all-girl band says Trump once made foursome request
Pussy Riot will be the opening act on Led Zeppelin's "Flying Over America Tour."

The outlandish all-girl heavy metal band from Russia, Pussy Riot, recently spilled the beans on their utterly bizarre encounter with the former President during his White House escapades.

In an exclusive interview with the eccentric writer Carolina Chipotle of "Bedroom Pillow Talk," the band unveiled a mind-blowing revelation: the Trumpturd himself once texted them, begging to join their band as a foursome.

Promptly responding with a resounding "NIET," the trio made it abundantly clear that they'd rather endure tonsil removal via their rectal cavity than let him anywhere near their rockin' crew.

Hooha, the bass player with a rebellious spirit, took things to the next level, suggesting she'd rather swim with piranhas in a tutu than come within 100 yards of his jumbo-sized orange posterior.

Pussy Riot's meteoric rise to fame included a show-stopping performance at the 2021 Guacamole Bowl in El Paso, Texas, where their infectious hit single "Frolicking in Frisco" soared to the coveted #1 spot on the Top 99 Music Chart.

Their wild shenanigans have garnered an astounding Instagram following of 19 million, attracting admirers including Ryan Seacrest, Kate Gosselin, Tom Brady, Barron Trump, Taylor Swift, Jerry Jones, and Anderson Cooper. Not to mention, their bizarre charisma has also drawn the attention of Willy Wonka, Carmen Miranda, Sasquatch, Miss Piggy, and Garfield.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot