HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - The Ricky Gervais Happy Hour Talk Show premiered to astounding viewership numbers.
Gervais beat out the top three nightly talk shows, Jimmy Kimmel, Stephen Colbert, and Jimmy Fallon.
In his second episode, Gervais booked none other than the "Pied Piper of Pussygrabberville" Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump.
Trump agreed to Ricky's request of "A nothing is off the table" format.
So here now is Ricky Gervais' "No Holds Barred" interview with Donald Trump.
RICKY: Well hello Trump. So how are ya doing?
DONALD: I'm fine, and the name is Mr. Trump.
RICKY: Okey dokey, Trump, so how the fuck are ya doing?
DONALD : Well, I'm a whole lot richer than you, that's for sure.
RICKY: 'fraid not old chap. I do know that you are definitley fatter than me - that's for damn sure. Hell I think you're even fatter than Ginni Thomas, and she is fucking humongous.
DONALD: Never met the woman. And I have never heard of her.
RICKY: Oh stop it asshole! Fucking STOP IT! America is sick and tired of you always saying that you have never heard of this woman, or you have never seen that woman, or you do not know who the hell that woman is, you sick perverted pussy grabber you.
DONALD: I really don't know who this Jenny is.
RICKY: It's Ginni. And you know that she is probably one of the only three or four assholes left in America who still actually believe that you won the election.
DONALD: I did win the election -
RICKY: Bull Fucking Shit. In what world do you possibly think that you won? I mean Joey (Biden) received 87 million more votes than you.
DONALD: He cheated -
RICKY: NO! NO! NO He did not cheat. You just cannot stand the fact that Biden kicked your ass from Maine all the way across "The Fly Over States" and over to Oregon.
DONALD: Look slick, you're a Brit. You should not even be here in America. You should be back in London sucking on the thick fog.
RICKY: And you. You should be in prison. And according to information guru Andy Cohen, you are going to find your 349½ pound tub of lard body in Sing Sing Prison, where the bruthas are going to turn you into a sissy version of Marjorie Taylor Greene.
DONALD: Well, Mr. Geritol, I got news for you. Little do those black guys know that I am trained in Karate, Jiu-Jitsu, Taekwondo, and face spitting.
RICKY: Okay fella. I think that I've just about had enough of your fucking lies. Tell Melania that I said cheerio.
DONALD: We're estranged, I don't see her or talk to her.
RICKY: Oh yeah, that's right. I forgot. Melly is getting her crotch boinked by LeBron.
DONALD: Never heard of him.
RICKY: Bye loser. And say hi to the guys in Sing Sing.
NOTE: As a parting gift, Gervais gave Trump a $20 gift certificate to McDonalds.
