Tom Cruise Starts Summer Acting School for Young Male 'Hotshot' Actors

Funny story written by UncleDale

Saturday, 6 August 2022

image for Tom Cruise Starts Summer Acting School for Young Male 'Hotshot' Actors
Tom Cruise is 72 years old.

Tom Cruise, still youthful looking - (and who knows how?) - is feeling his age a little, so has started a summer acting school in Hollywood for young actors.

Cruise gave his first lecture to about 20 young macho, good looking actors.

You guys remind me of me when I was first starting out.

They put me in a stupid fairy tale movie about a young virgin and her lost Unicorn. I had to constantly run around in a skimpy loincloth, grin a Lot - (luckily, I have a great grin) - and basically save the Unicorn from being Unicorn burgers for the Dark Lord.

That is when I learned my first basic acting rule. Be able to Run.

In most of your movies you will spend a quarter of the time running after villains.

Seems archaic. right? - with bikes, scooters, motor bikes, skateboards, etc. all over the place - Plus buses and cabs.

Humans are running animals and running onscreen catches the attention - and ratchets up tension. So, the plot and dialogue can be crappy, and you still get a hit.

When older and you can't really run anymore - learn to Fly.

You can go around looking sexy in flying gear, (without dieting) - and you get to sit around a lot - and drink, get massages, etc,

And by that time, you will be really tired of the fucking running - running - running. in every film.

Anyway, acting is mainly smiling and being charming - but you do have to know how to run. The hardest part of the job.

At your age, your legs are your Money Maker.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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