In California, in Hollywoodland, in Los Angeles, there are lots and lots of doctors. And they have the money to dress nicely and look respectable in a town where respect is a word used by junkies and hookers and screenwriters … but not by anyone who…
These are not professional actors but people pretending to do their jobs and failing, like in a crash, bang, boom. "Oh, gosh, gee-whiz!" The World Bad Actors Awards go to people failing at their jobs. London cab drivers will never receive this awa…
China has opened its doors to all trans people. Wow! You’d think they would hate anyone who’s different, but a spokeslady for Chinese theatre has said: “Oh no, we love men dressed as woman in Chinese theatre. When the trans people of the world com…
Gary Orpingthwaite from down the road has been complaining, as he has done for 25 years, since he went to RADA, and pretended to be a Teaspoon for eight hours a day that the only work he seems to be offered at Christmas is Pantomime or Father Christm…
Kevin Morrisey, a vaguely attractive action star from your youth, is now playing a slightly old version in a very similar programme that starts next week. As the Maverick cop in the programme you watched with your mates at university he was quick…
Tom Cruise, still youthful looking - (and who knows how?) - is feeling his age a little, so has started a summer acting school in Hollywood for young actors. Cruise gave his first lecture to about 20 young macho, good looking actors. You guys…
WEST MONROE, Louisiana - (Satire News) - According to Ipso Facto News, that hairy bearded bunch of coon asses from down around the bayous of Louisiana are not really whom they claim to be. IFN reporter Tapioca Swizzle has learned from a very sourc…
Following the shock axing of the middle of the road snoozefest Neighbours, all of the cast are currently heading to Stratford Upon Avon to chance their arms at the bard's best-known plays. Toadfish Rebecci said 'Alright, mate, I wanted to do some…
Well Hello there, I am Walter Muesli, a famed actor from the 1970s with a still flourishing career. I was most recently in an episode of Midsummer Murders. I had a scene with Neil Dudgeon. A great chap brings so much pathos to the role of Bar…
An actress that you liked in something because she played a nice character, is going to upset you with her turn as someone a lot more unpleasant. In the shocking turn of events, the actress who you like, but whose name you have forgotten will play…
The Covid-19 variant, called Delta, is turning into a War Of The Worlds film. So where is Tom Cruise? He’s supposed to be scaling down a rope, stop four inches above the floor and rescue the world from that killer virus called Delta. And Delta is no…
A new graduate actor denied claiming she’s wacky, just really enthusiastic, a bit zany perhaps and fit to explode into a rainbow of psychedelic imaginative ideas. Portia Portia, so good her parents named her twice, and goes by the affectionate nic…
The 'East End Coronation Cobblestone Street Theatre Company' claims to be an open and inclusive creative environment for working class actors, but has excluded one applicant because she hangs her toilet roll the wrong way round. 'The theatre is o…
Martina Glossop, a former star of Emmerdale, Coronation Street and Family Affairs (she played a passing fancy for Idris Elba and won't stop banging on about it) says that she fears that this year she may not get the chance to appear in a Pantomime.
A famed actor - you know, the one who is the son and nephew of a few other actors, and still thinks he gets parts in shows because of his talent - has said something again, and when it didn't go the way he wanted it to, has once again proclaimed that…
Renowned thespian, Geoff Act, has insisted that his one-man show at London's Prince Andrew Theatre will continue, despite the global pandemic. He will perform his three-hour monologue, My Word!, to empty seats until the run finishes in August. "I'...
After dating seriously for almost two years, Ray Campbell and Monique DuBois of Brooklyn, New York, found that their relationship had deteriorated to the extent that they could scarcely stand the sight of each other. Out of sheer desperation, they tu...
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