An Extremely Skinny Celine Dion Says That Her Grandkids Call Her Granny Swizzle Stick

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 4 August 2022

image for An Extremely Skinny Celine Dion Says That Her Grandkids Call Her Granny Swizzle Stick
Celine says that she is so skinny, she has to buy little girl's training bras.

LAS VEGAS - (Satire News) - Celine Dion has one of the best voices in the business, but when it comes to eating, she has the worst eating habit, west of the Mississippi River.

Dion, says she's afflicted with a condition known as Anoriffio Bulifotalosus, which basically means the woman is one skinny-as-hell bitch.

Celine says that in her eyes she is fat; not quite as fat as an opera singer, but fat nonetheless.

When asked by Hollywood Innuendos' Fajita San Guacamole, what her daily food intake consists of Ms. Dion giggled and replied that for breakfast she has an 2-ounce glass of diet water and six grapes.

She said that for lunch she has one Oreo cookies with the white cream completely scraped off, and a 2-ounce glass of diet water.

And for dinner Celine will usually just eat a goldfish that weighs ¼ of an ounce.

Ms. Dion told Fajita that all of her grandkids call her Granny Swizzle Stick.

When asked how much she weighs, she replied that she fluctuates between 61¼ pounds and 61½.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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