CHICAGO – (Satire News) – The Hasbrutha Toy Company, formerly Hasbro, has just introduced it's brand new Betsy Doll edition.
A rep for the huge toy company, Agatha Milladilla, 42, stated that the latest doll, in keeping with being politically correct will feature a Betsy who is not 6-foot-2-inches (in scale) but the more realistic 5-foot-5-inches (in scale).
The doll will also feature a bikini line tattoo, along with a pierced nostril ring, lower lip ring, and a nipple ring,
Ms. Milladilla, who just recently divorced her third husband, added that the company decided to be totally realistic and the new 2022 Betsy will also feature cellulite, spider veins and a yeast infection.
SIDENOTE: The company did balk at the idea of having the new Betsy suffer from hellacious mood swings as well as being bulimic.