Mar-A-Lago, Florida – (Satire News) – Now that she is no longer confined to the White House, the former “Be Best” woman has started to speak her mind more and more regarding her loser husband.
Melania recently appeared on “The View” and she told Whoopi Goldberg that without his toupee and his orange mascara, Donaldo looks like he’s 91, instead of 75.
She went on to say that he is not as good in bed as he thinks he is. She pointed out that she stopped having sex with him, when he refused to stop eating his damn Big Macs during coitus.
Melania then told co-host Joy Behar, who hates Trump even more than she hates the cellulite on her va-jay-jay, that whenever she tells him that she is going to divorce his old, wrinkled orange ass, he throws himself on the floor like an effen Persian rug, and he starts sobbing like a little-fingered sissy bitch.
In a Related Story. Donald recently confided in Maria Bartiromo that there is no one who French kisses better than Ivanka.