The Actress Expected A Lead Role

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Monday, 22 March 2021

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Some call this place home.

Everything was crisp and sunny when they said, “I do.” Then she didn’t get the leading role. Instead, she had to walk behind the prince. They wouldn’t even let her wear the crown jewels of her choice. So what’s a former television star, who was once sort of famous to do?

She quit the palace and went back to Hollywood, taking her husband and child.

Then she rambled on in an interview, describing the harsh treatment given to her by her husband’s family. She was silenced by the gang, not allowed to voice her opinions, kept in the back row at balcony appearances, couldn’t even speak up…”

“Well, I thin..” started the prince.

“Quiet. Let me handle this.”

And the once happy, gregarious, and active prince reluctantly did just that. He clammed up.

Some described the interview as the prince silently watching his wife throw his entire family under the bus.

But that family has been around for a long time. Going strong for over a thousand years now. And it's pretty resilient. They beat the French, the Vatican, Hitler, Mrs. Simpson, and no 39-year-old television star will keep them under the bus very long.

They have canons. They have crossbows. They have castles. They have the Tower. Beefeaters, history, and they have spokespeople (never seen) who issue statements. Those spokespeople always manage to retain the elegant upper ground.

The Palace issued a pointed statement regretting any pain the Duchess may have suffered, adding that sometimes memories do differ, but a thorough investigation will occur.

And oh yes, Buckingham Palace is also looking into accusations that the Duchess may have bullied her working staff, several of whom quit after a short tenure.

How do you like them apples?

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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