Andrew Cuomo Never Paid Hush Money To A Porn Star

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Tuesday, 2 March 2021

image for Andrew Cuomo Never Paid Hush Money To A Porn Star
"So, I paid hush money to a porn star! So what?"

He’s a flirt. He’s a little too handy. He likes the ladies, particularly the younger ones, or maybe it’s of all ages, but he never paid money to a porn star, and he didn’t have an affair with a Playboy Bunny weeks after his wife gave birth to a child.

The hush money payer is regaled as the leader of the Republican Party. Republicans want him to run for President in 2024. Forget his: You can grab a woman by the pussy and get away with it because you're famous, or the good Nazis, the over 28 sexual misconduct complaints, his incompetence, ignoring the pandemic, half a million dead, over 5 million sick.

“Do you ever date older men?”

“Knock it off, Governor. Stay in your space.”

Cuomo was out of line. Not polite. Doubtful he'd want his daughters propositioned in the same way, but is it time for him to resign? To call in the state Attorney General? How about Homeland Security?

Just when the Southern District of New York finally, after four years of trying, got a hold of Trump’s financial and tax records. Boom! The Governor is in the headlines, accused of being a salacious, overbearing predator, and must resign.

“Knock it off, Governor. Stay in your space.”

Fox News grabbed Cuomo’s accusations like the Golden Goose. They will spin them as though the Texas freeze never happened (it was AOC’s fault, anyway). Ted Cruz didn’t skip freezing Texas to catch the sun in Cancun, COVID-19 was so yesterday, and Donald Trump didn’t attempt an insurrection, try to overthrow a legitimate election, threaten the lives of House and Senate members, as well as his Vice President, but so what? There’s a Democrat in the crosshairs.

“Knock it off, Governor. Stay in your space.”

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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