Political Golden Globe Awards

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Monday, 1 March 2021

image for Political Golden Globe Awards
The Political Golden Globe awards are here!

Yes, it’s that time of year again, and guess who was awarded the most awards? Donald Trump! He was awarded the Greatest Loser Award for losing the most famous, powerful, and influential political office in the world.

There was a standing ovation when his name was announced, but Trump refused to go up on stage to receive the award. He was expecting something more positive.

But Trump’s awards didn’t stop there. He also won the Biggest Whiner Award. He was teed-off because close runner-ups to Trump’s Whiner Award were Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, and Representative Louie Gohmert of Texas.

If it had been Turkey’s President Tayyip Erdogan or Israel’s Benjamin Netanyahu, okay, but to be in competition with those two was something else for Trump to whine about. Again, Trump would not go up on stage to receive his award, but sulked in his seat, hopeful of winning the Political Golden Globe for World-Class Leader.

The Political Golden Globe for World-Class Female Leader went to Kamala Harris. Trump thought it should have gone to his mother. Hearing that, for the first time in four years, Melania’s eyes opened up as wide as oranges. Someone remarked that she seemed to shoot flames out of her mouth at Trump. Since his mother hadn’t won, Trump said the awards were rigged, and he was leaving. Melania nailed him back down to his seat with the five-inch heel of her Christian Louboutin shoe on his foot.

The rest of the evening was uneventful. However, when Joe Biden was awarded the Political Golden Globe for World-Class Leader, Melania Trump stood and applauded, keeping one firm heel down on top of Trump’s foot.

Joe Biden River Danced down the aisle, up onto the stage, and to the microphone. Removing his Ray-Bans, he said, “Imagine, all of this for Sleepy Joe.”

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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