SCARECROW, Kansas – (Satire News) – The news media has confirmed that a chicken farmer in Scarecrow Kansas, has an astounding eye-laying hen that can lay 80 eggs per day.
RumorLand News reporter Zackary Yukon, interviewed Nathan Tadpole, and he was told that Chelsea the Chicken, at first was only laying 8 or so eggs per day. But after she got kicked by a rescue emu, she suddenly started making upwards of 30 to 40 eggs on a daily basis.
An egg-laying hen expert from Philadelphia, examined Chelsea, and he found that when the emu kicked her in her pubic region, it jumbled up her ovaries something fierce.
So now, with a little bit of female hormones being added to her daily supply of chicken feed, Chelsea is now producing an unbelievable 80 eggs per day.
Meanwhile, RumorLand News is reporting that the rather plumpish Amy Schumer, has offered $8,000 for Chelsea, saying she’ll pay for herself in 5 or 6 months.