The Clash Back Together Again - Without Any Of The Former Members

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 30 December 2020

image for The Clash Back Together Again - Without Any Of The Former Members
The Clash writing new songs earlier

The Clash, the group who, along with the Sex Pistols, were largely responsible for the success of the Punk Rock movement in the UK in the late 1970s, are a 'going concern' once more, and are currently in the recording studio laying down tracks for a new album, scheduled to be released in the spring.

Plans are also afoot for a worldwide tour.

The important fact that Clash fans might like to bear in mind about this sudden 'getting back together' is that the band now comprises none of its former members.

In the places of Joe Strummer, Mick Jones, Paul Simonon, and Topper Headon, are four completely new members who you will never have heard of, because this story - as interesting as it might be - is completely untrue.

Working on the assumption that there might, possibly, be a grain of truth in it, however, the new lead singer is Reg Smith, who sells fruit on Walford Market, with Johnny Rubbish, a council dustman, on lead guitar.

Dennis Abercrombie, 74, plays bass guitar, and the line-up is completed by George Drummer, appropriately enough, on the drums.

The Clash were active from 1976 to 1986, and had massive worldwide success with countless* hit singles and albums, but readers will know that this new lot won't, because, as I told you up above, I just made the story up.

If you were paying attention, that is.

* Not exactly countless, but a lot.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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