NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Bedroom Pillow Talk has just announced that ABC has signed Meghan Markle to replace Meghan McCain.
Carolina Chipotle with BPT spoke with an executive producer of the daytime talk show, who said that, now that the presidential election is over, the political services of McCain will no longer be relevant.
He added that the show will be getting rid of its right-wing element and move from a free-for-all format to a fresher, younger, less argumentative format.
Whoopi Goldberg, the lead host of the show, told Chipotle that she was glad to finally be getting rid of that trouble-making, holier-than-thou, wig-wearing white extremist.
Co-host Sunny Hostin said that she has never known a more sarcastic, arrogant individual than Meghan McCain. On several occasions, the New York-born Hostin told McCain that she was the female Donald Trump.
And Joy Behar, who, perhaps, hated Trump and Meghan McCain more than a pole dancer hates a yeast infection, said that one time Fake Blondie got so mad at her, that she actually bit her on her left breast.
Behar giggled as she said that, luckily, she was wearing a raincoat at the time.
Meanwhile, Meghan Markle has said that she will be revealing lots of juicy gossip about the English royals, including Queen Elizabeth, Prince Charles, Camilla, Prince Andrew, and even non-royals like Piers Morgan, Elizabeth Hurley, J.K. Rowling, and Harry Maguire.
Markle told the show’s producers that she has asked Prince Harry, Kim Kardashian, and her BFF Melania Trump to appear on the season’s first show, and all three have agreed.