Marvel’s New Captain America is Black

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 1 August 2020

image for Marvel’s New Captain America is Black
Anthony Mackie will be taking over the role of Captain America from Chris Evans.

HOLLYWOOD – (Movie Satire) - The latest actor to portray the Marvel superhero Captain America is Anthony “The Bro” Mackie, who just happens to be black.

He recently spoke with Howard Stern, and expressed how thrilled he was at the fact that he had beaten out 713 white actors, 194 Hispanic actors, 14 Asian actors, and an actor who is 50 percent Kickapoo.

Mackie told Stern that he has informed the producers that he wants Captain America’s shield to have the BLM logo on it.

He also wants to have Captain America be a big fan of hip hop music, and in particular, the music of Lil Wayne, Snoop Dogg, and Zombie Zulu Yo.

Mackie asked for, and had installed, a basketball hoop on the movie soundstage, where he says he has perfected the art of 3-point shooting, the pick and roll, and trash-talking.

Stern asked him if it was true that there will be several scenes in the movie where Captain America will actually be dribbling a basketball. Mackie smiled from ear-to-ear and replied, "Hell, yeah, brutha!"

Anthony Mackie proudly boasted that he has convinced LeBron James, Kawhi Leonard, and Giannis Antetokounmpo to appear as themselves in cameo roles.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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