Kraftwerk Gig Voted 'Best Of All Time'

Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 2 May 2019

image for Kraftwerk Gig Voted 'Best Of All Time'
Dumbfounded members of the audience - don't worry, their kids'll get it

A gig by electronic pioneers Kraftwerk at Berlin's Rockpalast venue in 1970, has been voted 'Best Concert Of All Time', by a man with a sense of irony.

The gig, performed in front of an audience of around 200 unsuspecting German music fans, was the first time that anyone had experienced the alien sounds of the band that would provide the basis, creativity and inspiration for almost everything else that mattered in the world of music in the future.

It wasn't as clear as all that to the audience on the night, however.

Featuring Ralf Hutter on keyboards, Florian Schneider-Esleben on flute and vibes, and Klaus Dinger on drums, the band battered away at the sensations, perceptions and patience of the dumbstruck audience, leaving them with a feeling of having witnessed, in slow motion, a horrific car crash from which they just could not avert their eyes.

Seemingly stunned into silence by the assault on their ears, the crowd sat mesmerized by the bizarre happenings around them. Many thought they had come by mistake; others winced at what they were hearing; others just stared, uncomprehending. Strange combinations of instruments and 'instrument sounds' were, perhaps, not what they'd expected. Clearly, some were not ready for this, and wouldn't be for another 10 years.

Some parts of the gig were like a long sound check. Others, appeared to be almost 'unplanned improvisation'. Nobody danced. Probably, the notion of dancing never occurred to the watchers. Some nodded their heads, and others clapped. Some regarded the three musicians in a way that was reminiscent of the way the apes regarded the giant black monolith at the beginning of the Stanley Kubrick film, '2001: A Space Odyssey'. This was new.

Music fan, Moys Kenwood, who adjudged the concert after seeing it on a video on YouTube, said:

"This gig was a one-off. It was like a group of frightened human beings had been shepherded into a room and made to listen to something they'd never heard the like of before. It was an experiment in human psychology, a real 'let's watch and see' moment. For a while, it looked risky. People looked real nervous. They heard the sounds, but didn't know what to do about them. This was a change in direction."

For those who want to see it, the video of the concert can be seen by copy-and-pasting the link:

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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