Hollyweird, Californicate – For five or six months now, the world has waited, with bated breath, to learn just how Jordy Pee will handle the reboot of Rod Sterling's iconic television series The Dusky Region.
Well, we need wait and wonder no longer; CeeBeeEss Anal Access has shared the first episode of the steaming series, and critics agree, “It's a real turd,” said Ima Kritik. “It's more disturbing than a toilet full of shit that won't flush because it's stopped-up by a used tampon that should never have been there in the first place, even if its user did indulge in a bit of backdoor whoppee—no offense intended to Ms. Goldberg.”
“There are unsettling plot obstructions, a high degree of flatulent noise, and even disruptions of the very bowels of drama itself, such as Hollyweird conceives it,” gushed Di A. Rhe-Ah, one of the show's detractors, who is allegedly related to “the late, great Rod Sterling estate.”
“It's not all that bad,” CeeBeeEss executive Les Lee Moonie insists. “After all, it's keeping Jordy and his co-stars, Greg Kinney-Ear, Jo Kono, and Kumbaya Pajamas, off the breadlines, and it's keeping the likes of Ima Kritik and her ilk off the unemployment lines—at least for the time being.”