Trump To Star In Sequel To 'All The President's Men'

Written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 21 January 2019

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Hard to get on with?

An overdue sequel to the classic 1976 movie 'All the President's Men' is set to be the summer's big hit, starring the president himself, Donald J. Trump.

The original movie starred Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman, and both of the duo will appear in the new film, 'All the President's Rejects', which, as its title suggests, is about all the people Trump didn't quite see eye-to-eye with, or who didn't quite see eye-to-eye with him..

The list of such people is not endless, but it's fairly long.

Prominent are Chief of Staff, John Kelly; Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson; White House Chief Strategist, Steve Bannon; Secretary of Defense, James Mattis; Director of ICE Tom Homan; FBI Director, James Comey; Attorney General, Jeff Sessions; campaign manager, Paul Manafort; and US Ambassador to the UN, Nikki Haley.

There are also around 50 others, but there is only so much you can cram into a 2-hour movie. To name some of them anyway: Don McGhan, Joe Hagin, Scott Pruitt, Ty Cobb, Tom Bossert, Michael Anton, H.R. McMaster, David Shulkin, Rob Porter, Sebastien Gorka, Tom Price, Anthony Scaramucci, Reince Priebus, Sean Spicer, Michael Dubke, Michael Flynn, Andrew McCabe, Preet Bharara, Gary Cohn, John McEntee, Ryan Zinhe, John Feeley, Mira Ricardel, Nadia Schadlow, Hope Hicks, Sally Yates, Katie Walsh, KT McFarland, Omarosa Newman, Dina Powell, and Rachel Brand. You can see I've left the ladies until last, just as Trump would have done.

Apologies to anyone who feels they should have been included.

Trump was famous for coining the phrase "You're fired!" in his very own TV show, 'The Apprentice', which might go a long way towards explaining the rather excessive turnover of staff since he has been in the White House.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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