Written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 19 February 2014

LOS ANGELES - Ten years ago actress Tara Reid went in for breast augmentation surgery and the results were horribly horrendous to quote Playboy Magazine mogul Hugh Hefner.

Hefner said that both of Reid's nipples ended up unaligned and logistically out of place.

But now, the 38-year-old actress is thrilled that she will be checking into Our Lady of The Silver Screen Hospital in Los Angeles and undergoing what is being called a State-of-The-Art Nipple Procedure.

Her physician, Dr. Ashwani Raheem Mumbidabad, Jr., is presently the only doctor in the Western Hemisphere who performs this type of extremely delicate operation.

He told the Hollywood press that if he is off even as little as 1/48th of an inch, the results could be space creature like in appearance.

Tara stressed to her doctor that she does not want to end up with nipples that look like Joan Rivers' face, or Wayne Newton's face, or even Kenny Rogers' face.

SIDENOTE: Tara's boyfriend, Erez Eisen, who is five years younger than her has stated that he does not care if Tara ends up with one nipple or 17, he will still love the heck out of her just as long as the doctor does not mess with her perfect hooha.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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