Canary Wharf, London - (Ass Mess): Unemployed bankers have just 65 days left before the chance of a bit of Yuletide legover as thousands of disgruntled wives and partners freeze out their other halves from the bedroom in the current frigid economic climate.
With newspaper headlines screaming depression/recession, jobless numbers soaring and widespread withdrawal of credit card bingeouts opportunities sex is definitely off the menu for the vast majority of the newly laid-off.
And the odds for a bit of extramarital nookie are looking lousy too.
"No one wants to shag some Lemon (sic) Brothers hasbeen," City dating agency guru Ms Doreen Knockers said today.
"The only guys getting it at the moment are oil magnates, cocaine dealers and pimps, not necessarily in that order."
