Shares in Golden Nuggets Increase Tenfold

Written by Jaffa Forbes

Friday, 25 January 2008

image for Shares in Golden Nuggets Increase Tenfold
A typical nervous business man who's eaten too much sweet cereal

Now is a good time to invest in Nestle and in particular their brand of intensely sweet golden cereal 'Golden Nuggets'.

Top economists are stumped as to why, as the stock market crashes around us, the share price of this so called 'Gold' owning company is increasing dramatically. It's having an affect on the retail price as well, a bowl of Golden Nuggets will now set you back £16.78, or $0.58 in America.

The reason, some analysts are suggesting, is due to a large amount of nervousness and tension in the City, as large business men driving TVR's loosen their ties and start to sweat over the recent crash, they are eating more and more bowels of cereal to combat their nerves.

Naturally, this has pulled up all cereal sales, but Golden Nuggets seem to be a favourite.

The brand label cartoons on the boxes of Golden Nuggets refused to comment. I tried asking them, but they remained silent.

The bottom line is you'd be a fool not to invest in Golden Nuggets.

Do it! NOW.

Well, why are you still here?!

Jaffa Forbes

(has eaten too many Golden Nuggets and is feeling a little bit twitchy)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more