XBOX 360 Elite Goes Corporate.

Funny story written by triso

Friday, 30 March 2007

image for XBOX 360 Elite Goes Corporate.
Chairman Gates Unveils New PC Platform

In a worldwide teleconference today, Microsoft stunned the world by announcing that they are dropping support, as of May 1, 2007 for all remaining versions of Windows including Server 2003, XP and Vista.

In its place the Xbox 360 Elite will be renamed to "the M2" and sold with a USB keyboard and mouse.

Microsoft chairman Bill Gates said, "I know I've had a few drinks but consolidation was the only option to stem the bleeding of red ink from the frantic repair of bugs and security problems in Vista," adding, "and it doesn't hurt that we control the hardware too."

Mr Gates also commented, "With these accessories, the M2 is better, faster and cheaper than the current offerings from Intel and AMD." The retail price is expected to be $200 to $250 in North America.

In order to get the corporate sales of the M2 started, Microsoft will bundle a new version of Office for the M2 with the first 200 million units allotted for North America.

When asked about security and malware threats, Mr. John Rodmen, former Xbox group product manager, now M2 product manager said, "I know I've had a few drinks but don't worry. The M2 is rock-solid, no anti-virus or adware removing product is required. None! Really!"

After the presentation Ms. Edie Chan, an analyst with market research firm ICE Canada said, "I know I've had a few drinks but did anyone find it strange that they didn't mention plans for Europe?" The general consensus was that Microsoft was licking their wounds and didn't consider the euro-market worth competing in since they were fined 500 million Euros for antitrust practices.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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