The all new Biblical restaurant: Adam’s Rib

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Sunday, 18 June 2023

image for The all new Biblical restaurant: Adam’s Rib
womenfolk gonna git their ribs Biblically! Yeeeee-Ha!

Coming soon to an Arkansas foodery near you, the all-new Biblical restaurant “Adam’s Rib.”

D’you like ribs slathered in hickory-smoked chipotle honey-garlic sauce? Wooooo-doggy, I bet you do!

I bet Jesus loved his ribs too! And Noah and Snakeboy or whoever else is in that there Bible (most Christians don’t actually read the book, they just like the preacherman to pick some scary passages to make the kids do their homework and for the ladies to sit down, shut the fuck up, and cook me some more ‘o them ribs covered in Tex-Mex BBQ mesquite with southwest dipping sauce!)

If’n God took a rib from Adam to create Eve, then where did Eve get herself a full rack of ribs?

From “Adam’s Rib”!

In accordance with Biblical law, womenfolk cannot eat ribs at the restaurant in the same room as the menfolk. They gotta eat in back, where the Dumpsters are … it’s God’s way. Thanks for voting against abortion. Now more evangelicals can be born to tell everyone they’re gonna burn in hell ‘cuz Jesus loves them.

Loves them ribs! Yeeeeeee-ha!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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