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Funny satire stories about Fast Food

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Funny story: Trump And Hamburgers And Delusional People

Trump And Hamburgers And Delusional People

There is living proof, as witnessed by Donald Trump’s behavior, that a diet of hourly hamburgers and diet Coke, (apologies to the Cola company) can make one delusional. Though Trump in no way resembles the hamburger-eating character of the POPEYE...

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Funny story: Obese Aussie rats blame humans for getting stuck in drains!

Obese Aussie rats blame humans for getting stuck in drains!

Modern day garbage is causing a fat epidemic in subterranean Australia. In the past, rats fed on discarded, rotting cabbage leaves, stinking fish rests, Brussels sprouts, and so on. In fact, a healthy, calorie-reduced diet. However, human food con...

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Funny story: More UFOs spotted over central Scotland

More UFOs spotted over central Scotland

For years, the post-apocalyptic wasteland between Edinburgh and Glasgow has been a hotspot of UFO sightings. This weekend three more unusual craft were observed over the chippies and needle exchanges of Falkirk. Local UFO spotter Bob McJobbie had...

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Funny story: A celebrity with a heart as big as his bank account (well, almost)

A celebrity with a heart as big as his bank account (well, almost)

Actor Tom Banks, whose net worth is estimated at $350 million, give or take a million, played Santa Claus at an N-n-Out Boogers in Fontana, Californicate, treating his fans to a free lunch. “Order anything you want,” he told his devotees. “Money i...

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Funny story: America's 'Statue Removal' Craze Triggers The Downfall Of An Icon

America's 'Statue Removal' Craze Triggers The Downfall Of An Icon

For over 50 years Ronald McDonald has been a symbol of family and fun spreading happiness to children of all ages around the world. But earlier today, thousands of Ronald McDonald statues across the globe were either taken down or covered with bla...

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Funny story: McDonut's burgers found to have traces of meat

McDonut's burgers found to have traces of meat

Following claims by the McDonut's chain that their burgers are more nutritious than a rump steak, the International Standards Association conducted a scientific analysis of their burgers globally. The summarised results show the following slightly wo...

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Funny story: Terror at Mickey-D's

Terror at Mickey-D's

A Mickey-D's customer was betrayed by employees who ID'd him and made him wait a little extra time for his order so the food patrol could come and deny him his last meal. He didn't have it his way at Mickey-D's. Jackson went through the so calle...

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Funny story: KFC isn't as FLG as it used to be (and ought to be)

KFC isn't as FLG as it used to be (and ought to be)

DOGPATCH, KY ---- Kentucky Fried Chicken, more commonly known by the initials FLG (for "finger-lickin' good") claims to be a restaurant that "happens to sell fast food," rather than a fast-food franchise. With nearly 20,000 locations, there's probably one near you unless you live in a country other than the United States, although there are one or two FLGs in such third-world hellholes as the Unit...

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Funny story: McDonaldo's freshens its menu (sort of)

McDonaldo's freshens its menu (sort of)

ANYTOWN, USA -- At McDonaldo's, if you buy anything other than a 1/4 Pounder, you can go pound sand, as far as the freshness of your order is concerned. "We don't do 'fresh,' when it comes to our hamboogers, cheeseboogers, or Big Macks," CEO Ronaldo...

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Funny story: Fast Food restaurants ban "Healthy" looking people

Fast Food restaurants ban "Healthy" looking people

Only in Trumps America would such a move be considered in keeping with current equality laws. After recent pressure from 'large' groups of eatavists, several fast food restaurant chains have given in and applied a nationwide ban on healthy peopl...

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Funny story: Allahuh Ak Bar opens in Bradford

Allahuh Ak Bar opens in Bradford

A new non-alcoholic kebab bar has opened in Bradford today specialising in vegetarian and gluten-free kebabs, although in an effort not to insult some potential customers, it won't be declared nut-free. Thought by cynics to be named after the hue...

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Funny story: Cenk Uygur: Extraordinary, Unprecedented Anti-Corporation Rant (1/2)

Cenk Uygur: Extraordinary, Unprecedented Anti-Corporation Rant (1/2)

A recent "virulent" rant by Cenk Uygur has gone "viral" on Youtube... Oh, crap. Mere semantics again, isn't it? Anyways, have a look at this transcript. Responses on a snail-card please. Well, yeah, why not? After all highly eloquent and intellectually satisfying responses from Ted Nugent and Sarah Palin have already appeared... So don't be last in the race to the bottom. Still, wh...

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Funny story: Candidate Sanders picks Colonel Sanders for VEEP slot

Candidate Sanders picks Colonel Sanders for VEEP slot

Burlington, Vermont -- Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders has selected deceased fast food mogul Col. Harlan David Sanders as his vice presidential running mate. Asked to describe the "flavor" of their campaign, Col. Sanders said: "It...

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Funny story: McDee's To Test New "Make-It-Yo-Damn-Self" Locations in L.A.

McDee's To Test New "Make-It-Yo-Damn-Self" Locations in L.A.

Los Angeles, CA - In an effort to keep up with the times and not slide down the grease sewer of bankruptcy, McDonald's is rolling out implementation of their latest marketing gimmick. "We've poured hundreds of millions of dollars into this project...

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Funny story: Back In Gear: The new Jeremy Clarkson motoring show!

Back In Gear: The new Jeremy Clarkson motoring show!

Back In Gear HQ, London: Jeremy Clarkson BACK to present live shows to avoid paying out £10million in refunds to angry fans. Jeremy Clarkson will front the 'Back in Gear' Live World Tour, with Richard Hammond and James May, which is set to make more...

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Funny story: Warren Buffet advises schoolchildren to "eat junk"

Warren Buffet advises schoolchildren to "eat junk"

OUT THERE -- Famed financier Warren Buffet says his secret source of energy is in his name: buffet. "Eat like it's your last meal," he advises six-year-old schoolchildren, "and you're at an all-you-can-eat buffet!" That's where the octogenarian-pl...

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Funny story: Nobel Physics Prize Accidentally Awarded To Micro Chips Inventor Dyson McDonald

Nobel Physics Prize Accidentally Awarded To Micro Chips Inventor Dyson McDonald

The Nobel Prize for innovative development in physics has been accidentally awarded to Dyson MacDonald, the inventor of "microwave chips" and not the microchip inventor Werner Jacobi. The invention of the integrated circuit, or microchip goes bac...

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