Fanatical Gun Association Wants 5 year Olds Trained - Untapped Market, Huge Potential Profits

Funny story written by UncleDale

Tuesday, 17 January 2023

image for Fanatical Gun Association Wants 5 year Olds Trained - Untapped Market, Huge Potential Profits
Little Lindy Lou, shooting her first gun x

A spokesman for the Fanatical Gun Association (FGA) gave a symbolic speech in Pistol, Texas which has a huge gun factory grinding out one AR-15 rifle every 5 seconds.

“The U. S. has about 130 million civilian guns and they are still selling like crazy. Especially now that the Supreme Court encourages Gun Ownership,” said the Spokesman. “The 5-year-olds in Daycare are basically unprotected.”

A few FGA parents have trained their young kids to use a handgun and take it to school - but most are gun ignorant.

The FGA is calling for shooting ranges in all Daycare Centers and 5 and 6 year old started out with basic instructions and their own Kiddy handguns – to be supplied by the FGA.

The FGA will support and guide the kids throughout Life into bigger and bigger guns - till they get their first (but hopefully not their last) AR-15 semi-automatic machine Gun.

“If all kids and families are Armed, it will be a Safer world,” says the FGA. “But we have to start them Young. Bend the Twig early. “

Designers right now are working on Colorful plastic guns for tiny hands, and they should be available the next Xmas season.

(Article Written by the FGA Writer Bot - ‘Rambo')

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot