To End Its Association With Prince Andrew

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 20 November 2019

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Already big news

In the last few minutes, it's been revealed that, due to the ongoing furore with regard to some rather potentially damaging underage sex allegations, the satirical news website has decided to drop all its current associations with the arrogant, snot-nosed, royalist, Andrew Prince.

Mr Prince, it's been alleged, had sex with an American girl three times before she was an adult, which, in his own words, would be classed as "somewhat unbecoming".

And this sentiment was echoed by the Spoof's owner, who said:

"Mr Prince is a naughty, dirty, filthy old scoundrel, who seems to think he can go around doing whatever he likes, to whoever he likes, with scant regard for the law, let alone anyone's feelings. He is an odious individual."

Speaking about Mr Prince's behaviour, he said:

"It's disgusting, disgraceful, and despicable, and we won't be associating with this no-mark anymore, apart from to drag his name through the mud, and to perpetuate all kinds of stories to his detriment."

The news follows similar action by accountancy firm, KPMG, and Standard Chartered Bank, who have both withdrawn their support for the Duke of York's business mentoring initiative, Pitch@Palace.

Others are said to be considering similar action, including the US-based conglomerate, Child Prostitutes-R-US.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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