Bernie Sanders Teams Up with Colonel Sanders

Written by JTamarkin

Wednesday, 26 August 2015

KFC has announced that all of its 7 Vermont locations will now feature Bernie Sanders cookbook recipes mixed with Colonel Sanders' old favorites.

New menu items include: Karl Marx progressive Jewish commie chicken patties, grilled Hillary extra-large chicken calves, flaming hot liberal Hebrew Trotsky wings, Bernie Sanders semi-sustainable organic free-range pinko bunny rabbit bites, and blackened Bernie Madoff renewable kosher pork sausage. The latter item will be blessed twice by Radical Rabbi Shlomo Goldschlager to ensure complete kosherness of the pigs.

All chickens, rabbits and pigs will be ethically and humanely treated, before their heads are chopped off by specially designed tiny little guillotines.

Concerning the free-range bunny rabbit bites, Bernie Sanders quipped: "I love rabbits. I look like a rabbit. I do, however, understand how difficult it is to catch the rabbits in a free-range environment, especially at guillotine time."

In related news, Neon Deion Sanders is opening restaurants in Burlington, Montpelier and Rutland in response to the Bernie Sanders-Colonel Sanders joint venture. Bernie Sanders tweeted: "That's OK. I like all kinds of fried chicken, watermelon, and black Americans almost as much as I love rabbits."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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