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Funny satire stories about chickens

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Funny story: Cockerel Broke Duckling's Legs, So Man Dealt With It

Cockerel Broke Duckling's Legs, So Man Dealt With It

There was high drama in one back garden in southeast Asia this morning, after a confrontation between a huge cockerel and a much smaller duckling left the latter with two broken legs. The cockerel, which stood around two feet tall, took issue with...

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Funny story: In Nod to Animal Rights, Tyson Grants Employed Birds Free Lifetime Housing and Healthcare

In Nod to Animal Rights, Tyson Grants Employed Birds Free Lifetime Housing and Healthcare

In a groundbreaking nod to animal rights, poultry producer, Tyson Foods, agreed to guarantee free lifetime room, board, and healthcare, including unlimited hormone treatment and antibiotics, for the millions of birds employed at its chicken and turke...

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Funny story: Zany Slummer: Boycott Windy's: “They're a bunch of cocks!”

Zany Slummer: Boycott Windy's: “They're a bunch of cocks!”

Zany Slummer, a comedienne and wannabe actress, who identifies as a bird, took to Twit yesterday to tweet her call for a boycott of Windy's. She sought to initiate the boycott because she is expecting to deliver a boy named Cott and because she thoug...

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Funny story: US chickens doing a runner in Brit Chicken Run!

US chickens doing a runner in Brit Chicken Run!

It seems that US over-bred chickens are not only being prepared for becoming nuggets in a global Chicken massacre machine, no! Due to mass breeding and pumping hormones through their tiny bodies, their brains are chemically developing too, and now in...

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Funny story: M.O.D pay chicken farmers millions as jet pilots scramble their eggs!

M.O.D pay chicken farmers millions as jet pilots scramble their eggs!

The Ministry of Defence has been forced to "scramble" their fighter jet flights over chicken runs in the UK because distressed chickens have been running for their lives as helicopters, fighter jets, and other UFO's (for chickens everything flying is...

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Funny story: "Mmmm, Tofurky!' Pleads Desperate Turkey in Final Week before Thanksgiving

"Mmmm, Tofurky!' Pleads Desperate Turkey in Final Week before Thanksgiving

Clearly feeling the heat as he approached his looming slaughter at the age of six weeks, a bloated five-week-old teenage turkey desperately attempted to talk up the appeal of "mock meats" like the widely popular soy-based Tofurky. "Mmmm, Tofurky!"...

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Funny story: Trump sucks egg out of chicken during interview

Trump sucks egg out of chicken during interview

As if the Trump presidency hadn't already provided us with enough surreal moments, an interview on the CNCB channel last night gave us a whole new dimension to his state of mind. While answering a question about trade embargoes with China, Trump...

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Funny story: Big ag has cross bred chickens with Dolly Parton

Big ag has cross bred chickens with Dolly Parton

Big Bend, TX - Scientists working with big agriculture have increased chicken breast size Texas style. The mutant chickens resulting from the work, according to local farmer Culo Gordo, are increasing profits by 126 percent. According to our sci...

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Funny story: "You Cluckin' What, Mate?" Aussie Boffins Crack Chicken Chatter

"You Cluckin' What, Mate?" Aussie Boffins Crack Chicken Chatter

Australian researchers have discovered that chickens are able to communicate in deep and meaningful ways. They have concluded that chickens can effectively talk to each other. Two researchers at City University in New South Wales, studied chickens...

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Funny story: Forced Molting - DON'T Try This at Home! (Unless You're Desperate to Get Pregnant)

Forced Molting - DON'T Try This at Home! (Unless You're Desperate to Get Pregnant)

When 53-year-old Denise Hobson first heard about the standard animal agriculture practice of "forced molting," by which female chickens are deprived of food and light for up to two weeks in order to artificially jolt their weary bodies into producing...

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Funny story: Chickens Strike After McDonald's Announces All Day Breakfast

Chickens Strike After McDonald's Announces All Day Breakfast

Shares of McDonald's stock fell 18% after traders learned that the recently introduced all-day breakfast menu was causing serious labor problems for the world's largest restaurant chain. Trading was hectic on the big board, driven primarily by i...

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Funny story: Bernie Sanders Teams Up with Colonel Sanders

Bernie Sanders Teams Up with Colonel Sanders

KFC has announced that all of its 7 Vermont locations will now feature Bernie Sanders cookbook recipes mixed with Colonel Sanders' old favorites. New menu items include: Karl Marx progressive Jewish commie chicken patties, grilled Hillary extr...

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Funny story: Why Does the Chicken Cross the Road? To Get Her New Leg!

Why Does the Chicken Cross the Road? To Get Her New Leg!

The countryside was bright at the crack of dawn and the cluck-clucking of the yard's twenty chickens sounded welcoming. Henrietta, the now famous chicken, also lived in this small farm house in rural Franklin, Texas. She clucked with the best of them and was obviously a leg up above the others. The reason? Henrietta had a new artificial leg. Henrietta the pet chicken received her $2,500...

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Funny story: Spring City Man Crosses Road. Gets to Other Side

Spring City Man Crosses Road. Gets to Other Side

Charles "Chick" Engals, life long Spring City, PA native left his home last week after telling his wife that he would return, she said, in an hour or so. After asking him where he was going, his response to her was, as always, that he was going to...

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Funny story: Red meat linked to erectile dysfunction, says Poultry Council study

Red meat linked to erectile dysfunction, says Poultry Council study

SACRAMENTO, CA - The Poultry Litigation & Underwriting Council (PLUC) released the results of a 17-year study Monday, linking erectile dysfunction to the consumption of red meat. The study was funded by a $136.7 billion grant from the new Unit...

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Funny story: Chicken Tastes Most Like Chicken Of All Things That Taste Like Chicken

Chicken Tastes Most Like Chicken Of All Things That Taste Like Chicken

Springdale, AR - Of all the foods across the world that taste like chicken, a study has found that chicken tastes most like chicken. The study was carried out by Tyson Foods, Inc. (NYSE: TSN), the world's second largest producer of not only chick...

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Funny story: Popeye's Chicken Reports That Their First Olive Oyl's Chicken Drive Thru Window Store Is Now Open For Business

Popeye's Chicken Reports That Their First Olive Oyl's Chicken Drive Thru Window Store Is Now Open For Business

LAFAYETTE, Louisiana - The Popeye's Chicken Fast Food Franchise is proud to announce that it has just opened the first of many Olive Oyl's Chicken Drive Thru Window Stores. The first Olive Oyl is located in Lafayette, Louisiana and there were roug...

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