Vanna White AKA "America's Letter Turner" Turns 70
BURBANK - (Satire News) - Vanna White, who Andy Cohen estimates has turned of 3 billion letters recently turned 70. Cohen reports that "The Letter Girl" celebrated with a birthday cake that was shaped like the spinning wheel on the top-rated "Whee…
Read full storyA Wisconsin Firefighter Is Very Upset With His Wife After He Finds a 12-Inch Vibrator In Her Panties Drawer
SHEBOYGAN, Wisconsin - (Satire News) - Traci Diddle with National Rumblings reports that a firefighter in Sheboygan found a 12-inch vibrator in his wife's panties drawer. The firefighter identified as Gavitt Drizzelinski, 29, said that he had been…
Read full storyA List of Ten Illegal Tweets From The Pussy Grabber Donald Trump
MAR-A-LAGO - (Satire News) - The Los Angeles Post-Gazette has compiled a list of ten illegal tweets that were put out by Donald The Pussy Grabber. The Trumptard knows full-well that he is violating tweeting policy by tweeting, since the orange ass…
Read full storyThe Queen of Reality Shows, Kate Gosselin Reveals That She Had Her Hooha (Vagina) Tuned Up
WYOMISSING, Pennsylvania - (Satire News) - Kate Gosselin, who is 47, opened up to RumorLand News writer Zackary Yukon. Kate, who was nicknamed "Kate The Great" by former lover Steven Tyler, frontman with Aerosmith, said that she is proud to announ…
Read full storyPub Patrons Have the Answer to The Overwhelming Immigration Problem
Exciting news folks. I just got the National Survey on Immigration done by the Pub Owners. The Bright Boys in Parliament are stymied - or don't have the Will to fix the problem. So, the Pub Owners stepped in. They are smart Guys. Basically,…
Read full storyThe Big News in Qatar was Not Boys kicking Balls Around - But the Camel Beauty Contest
At the same time muscular young men were kicking Balls (and each other) around in a stadium in Qatar - the main event was going on elsewhere. The Qataris hosted the World Camel Beauty Contest. Basically, the World Cup for Camels. The winner was…
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