Danica Patrick Explains The Nude Photos of Her And Aaron Rodgers
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - NASCAR princess Danica Patrick recently sat down with Fajita San Guacamole with Hollywood Innuendo at The Intoxicated Iguana Bar in New York City. The two have known each other ever since Danica was in high school…
Read full storyPutin Has Just Surpassed Hitler, Stalin, Hirohito, and Trump As The Most Evil SOB In History
CHICAGO - (Satire News) - Tabloid Today has just announced that Russian President Vladimir "The Human Douche Bag" Putin has just passed four of the most evil pieces-of-shit assholes in history. The publication's senior writer Papaya Bamboo, stated…
Read full storyMost Expensive Warship In History Is Ready To Fail, Er, Sail The Seven Seas! (Probably)
The American aircraft carrier USS Gerald R. Ford, the most expensive warship ever built that's named after a former president that liked to fall down stairs all across the country, is finally ready for duty. The U.S. Navy has approved the ship for re…
Read full storyThe Pope Mandates That Catholics Limit Sex To Once A Month!
THE VATICAN - (Satire News) - Pope Francisco has just issued a sexual order which gives him the authority to mandate intimate matters to the world's Catholics. The mandate states that due to several (unnamed) reasons, the high pope has ruled that…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Is Selling Her Used Condom Collection
PRICKLY PEAR, Arizona - (Satire News) - According to Tittle Tattle Tonight, the most hated bitch in the District of Columbia, Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene has just put her used condom collection on eBay. MTG, says that she was told that she could…
Read full storyDid Anyone Count The White House Silver After Donald Trump Left?
Oh, dear! Who would have guessed? After Donald Trump was voted out of the office and sent back down south to Florida, he neglected to hand over to the State Department an accounting of all of the foreign gifts he may have received while in the White…
Read full storyDonald Trump Insists That He Is Not A Card-Carrying Member of The Ku Klux Klan
BOSTON - (Satire News) - The twice-impeached one term resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. aka "Trump The Racist Tax-Evader" is reportedly fit-to-be-tied after reading in the supermarket tabloid, Whoa Today, that he is a charter member of the KKK. T…
Read full storyRishi Sunak doesn't know what taxes are
Chancellor Rishi Sunak has revealed that despite managing the finances of the UK, he doesn't actually know what taxes are. When asked by a journalist at a press conference, he said, "Is that what you call it? The money that all those people give to t…
Read full storyFurries to be barred from the UK Olympic team
The UK government have ordered that no "furries" will be allowed to compete in the Olympic team, or in any athletic events at national level. The move follows a controversial event where Eck Wine, 52, came fifth in the Chaffinch St Cock marathon whil…
Read full storyAlabama Has Just Named Donald Trump As 2022's Comeback Kid
MONTGOMERY, Alabama - (Satire News) - There is no state in the nation where the Trumptard is revered more than in Alabama. He is loved more by Alabamians than Idahoans love potatoes, residents of Maine love maple syrup, and Las Vegasers love douch…
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