Get Over It!
Today, Donald Trump’s Chief of Staff, Mick Mulvaney, took it upon himself to make the admission that: Yes, the United States of America told Ukraine that military aid would be withheld (to fight a threatened invasion by Russia) unless Ukraine found ‘...
Read full storyBernie Sanders Revivified After Sacrificing a Libertarian at an Alter to Karl Marx
Pundits noticed that Bernie Sanders look positively revivified at the last Democratic debate, bouncing on the stage and gesticulating like a sixty-year-old angrily chasing some kids off his lawn. And what explains Sanders’ sudden burst of energy,...
Read full storyCompletely Tattooed Felicity Huffman, Former Desperate Housewife TV Star, Walks Out of Prison
After 14 days of incarceration, Felicity Huffman, the former star of Desperate Housewives, stepped out of federal prison and into the car of this reporter for an exclusive two-minute interview. Q. Ms. Huffman, you look noticeably different, but...
Read full storyNASA Mistakes Kim Kardashian's Rear as Earth's Long Theorized Second Moon
In an embarrassing mistake sure make some heads roll, as well as eyes, NASA issued a retraction to a recent story that the long-theorized, but never confirmed, "Earth's Second Moon" had been found, once it was confirmed it was actually a picture of...
Read full storyStupid No More, Vows Nashville Man
After a lifetime peppered with foolish decisions and boatloads of wasted time, Ben Haldwell of Nashville, Tennessee, vowed to be stupid no nore. "No regrets, but it's time to try something different," sad Ben, who, among other things, had often ex...
Read full storyPresident Trump May Have Been Given Blow Job By Anne Sacoolas
It's been rumored that, after she was summoned to the White House to meet the parents of a young motorcyclist she had killed in England in August, Anne Sacoolas, the wife of a US intelligence officer, may have given President Donald Trump a blow job.
Read full storySam Allardyce Gets Manchester United Job
It's taken him 28 years and a succession of posts at Preston, Blackpool, Notts County, Bolton, Newcastle, Blackburn, West Ham, Sunderland, England, Crystal Palace and Everton, but it now looks like Sam Allardyce is finally going to get his hands on '...
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