Monkey Woods Goes Bonkers At Match Between England And Bulgaria
BILLINGSGATE POST: According to Sky Sports, an international soccer match between England and Bulgaria’s national teams was interrupted twice Monday by semi-nude streakers wearing Saran Wrap Speedos and hoodies. The referee was forced to pause th...
Read full storyObservers Startled When 129 Zombies Suddenly Awake from Deep Hypnotic Trance in U.S. House of Representatives
Washington - In a stunning development, 129 GOP congressmen thought to be braindead, were able to physically cast a vote against a president who was thought to have them completely hypnotized to support him regardless of how insanely illogical his be...
Read full storyNashville Man Single-Handedly Disproves Existence of Free WIll
Resolving centuries of philosophical debate over the existence of free will, Cody Barrett of Nashville, Tennessee, definitely proved that he hasn’t got it. “It was a blow, especially at first,” said Barrett regarding his discovery of his own lack...
Read full storyAnne Sacoolas Denies Driving On Wrong Side Of The Road
Anne Sacoolas, the American woman who was the driver involved in a road accident in England, which killed a 19-year-old motorcyclist, has denied that she was driving on the wrong side of the road when the accident happened. Harry Dunn was killed o...
Read full storyJimmy Sham Attacked By Hong Kong Phooey
One of the leaders of the Hong Kong protests, Jimmy Sham, has been taken to hospital after suffering a hammer attack, and being left in the street, covered in blood. Several witnesses said the attacker looked "a bit like a canine Kung Fu exponent…
Read full story