Johnny Carson “Carnak The Magnificent” One Liners
BILLINGSGATE POST: Johnny Carson was the very best. Some of his one liners: "A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou." Reading the contents of the envelope: "Name three things that have yeast." A: A, B, C, D, E, F, G. Q: What were some of the earlier forms of Preparation H? A: Shoo-be-doo-be-doo. Q: What do you look for when you're tracking a shoo-be-doo-be? A: Zippo Marx. Q: What do you...
Read full storyHuawei CFO Meng Wanzhou Is A Bit Tasty!
And, before we set off on the wrong foot, this is not some humorous reference to 'authentic Chinese food', just so you know. Meng Wanzhou, the Chief Financial Officer at Chinese communications giant, Huawei, who is 46 years old, was detained by th...
Read full storyTrump - A Terrible Human Being, Says His New Chief-of-Staff Mick Mulvaney
President Donald Trump has chosen his new Chief-of-Staff to replace Gen. John Kelly when the latter leaves the job in January, but some might wonder at his choice of a man, Mick Mulvaney, who already thinks the president is a "terrible human being".
Read full storyKanye West, Kid Rock, Ted Nugent and Sarah Palin To Throw Benefit Concert for Trump
White Settlement, TX President Trump's strongest supporters in the entertainment world have announced that they will have a benefit concert in support of the president. They will donate 2% of the profits to the Trump Defense Fund they know will be fo...
Read full storyEthnic Minority Figure Needs To Be On New £50 Note, Say Ethnic Minority Figures
More than 200 people have signed a letter published in today's Sunday Times, saying that a figure from the 'black and ethnic minority community' should feature on the new £50 note. Last month, the Bank of England asked the public to nominate a Bri...
Read full storyCatholic Priest Was "Only Joking" About Boy's Suicide
A Catholic priest who shot his big, fat, stupid mouth off at a boy's funeral, about how suicide will anger God and prevent a dead person's soul from entering heaven, has said he was only joking. Father Don LaQuesta (not real name, but nearly) was...
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