Why Netflix Is the Messiah
For years now, people have feasted their eyes to the sky and have asked The Lord to come back to this earth in hopes for a better future. I'm sure god said to his people that he did not feel that the time is ready, so he sent a piece of fortune that would help them…"forget about it." "I have a Netflix account" is such an effortless sentence. Saying something more like "I hold before me the powe...
Read full storyStephen Harper Has Plans to Turn Canada Into the World's Largest Junkyard
THE GREAT BLACK NORTH (Canada) - Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper, Canadian Conservative Party head honcho, since 2006 has made a mockery out of environmental policies in "The Great White North." So much so, in fact, that Harper is turning what...
Read full storyNew Google Maps app so detailed it will spot those buried bodies in your garden
Google has launched a new satellite into space last week. The Satellite's purpose is to improve the aerial photographs on their Google Maps app. "The detail on the pictures will be incredible" said head of Google Pierre Bustock. "You can see e...
Read full storyNew "How To Become A Crazy Cat Lady" and "I Wonder If He's Gay" Courses Added To ACEO's Schedule
The Simmons County Adult Career Education Outreach (ACEO) has announced that two new courses will be permanently added to their current curriculum, beginning in October. "How To Become A Crazy Cat Lady" and "I Wonder If He's Gay" will both be off...
Read full storyToker's guide to cooking could unveil clues to alzheimers
Have bong, get frying pan, wonder why your holding frying pan and put back. Have bong, turn on stove, feel sure you got frying pan out ready to cook, get frying pan its not there. Have bong, get dry mouth, go to fridge to get glass of milk, find frying pan put frying pan away in correct cupboard. Have bong, wonder why stove is on turn off, wonder why glass of milk is on counter? and repeat. And...
Read full storyMan Sues Ex-Girlfriend For Unpaid Sexual Favors
The male community of a small town in Nevada are extremely concerned about a recent lawsuit that has reached the local news. 31 year old Robert Peacock, of Rumsfield, is taking his ex-girlfriend to small claims court with accusations of unpaid sexual...
Read full storyManchester United: New Season, New Challenges
Everyone is waiting to see how Man Utd perform this season under new management following last seasons horrific performances. What will be his new line up? Who else will he buy? And the most important of all questions surrounding this mammoth club...
Read full storyHumanoid ISIS
The Yazidi of Iraq, now threatened of genocide, believe that God first created Angel Tavoos. Next, Adam. Then, God ordered all angels including Tavoos to bow to Adam. Tavoos refused, saying, "How can I bow to another being, especially one made of dirt." Regardless of what we read in religious books, it seems that man is an imperfect creature. Scientifically, man needs much more time before...
Read full storyChimps Sue Planet of the Apes Makers
Chimps are filing lawsuits against the Planet Of the Apes makers citing unfair portrayals in the film. One of the chimps signed furiously to his human counsel citing that the makers artistic license has been taken too far and these are not real ch...
Read full storyNorth Korea threatens to fire a rocket on itself
Pyongyang, August 12, 2014 - North Korea threatened today to shoot rockets at themselves as proof that it is ready to confront any threatening country. North Korean state news agency KCNA said that warmongering and provocative rhetoric of North...
Read full storySalmond's Scotland For Independence
Mr Salmond found the time out of his busy schedule to speak to ace Spoof reporter FBI AL over questions he is messing with 'The Union' purely to get his name in the history books. "Well of course it's nothing to do with me getting my name in lights or in the history books as the man who tried or succeeded in making Scotland an independent nation," said Salmond, "and in no way am I laying the gr...
Read full storyCameron solves lack of own parliamentary powers for the North of England
Cameron believes he has solved the problems of a lack of parliamentary powers for the North of England from a London centric society. In a radical move he plans to sell the North of England to China or Russia. Speaking to Daily Spoof reporter FBI...
Read full storyVacuum Salesman Can't Believe Your Family Isn't Already Fucking Dead
Your Home, USA-Mark Rosen has just entered your home to show you the great suction and cleaning power of his new Shark Rocket cleaning system, and to be honest, he can't believe how you and your family have survived without it. "Its suction power...
Read full storyElderly Take Over Virginia Old Folks Home
At 5:56 p.m on August 11, 2014, Christiansberg, Virginia police received a call from inside the Christiansberg Retirement Home. On the other line was a frightened employee who claimed that the entire home was being taken over by riot. I am as sho...
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