
NRA Holds America Hostage, Is Holed Up In Building Surrounded By Police
Two narrowed eyes peeked out of the slats over the window that were already narrow enough by themselves. They gazed imperturbably at the scores of police and FBI agents that surrounded the NRA ranch estate in North Carolina. Those eyes belong to Wayn...
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Isle of Wight News - Flowerpot statue comes under fire
The controversial new sculpture erected at the end of Ryde pier has come under even more fire from an unexpected source, the children's television programme Bill and Ben. "When we had that charity appeal in 1986 for people to send in spare flower...
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BigFoot LeBron James Shuts Up Big Mouth Jason Terry
When Gigantopithecus of the NBA knocks down little Cro-Magnon man, you do not have a story. You have a confirmation of the character of LeBron James as one-man egomaniacal wrecking crew. James delivered a major dunk, and Jason Terry of the Celtics...
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Isle of Wight News - I'm a Celebrity get me out of Ventnor
Ventnor Zoo my be home to the ferocious fennec fox and the terrifying terrapin twins, but the Australian jungle it is not. Not yet anyway. Producers of the surprisingly popular televisual reality show I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here are facing bud...
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Millions of Cypriots will go commando as EU bailout imposes austerity knicker tax says seer
Nicosia - A Cyprus psychic whose visions interpret supernatural omens by staring intently at expensive underwear has warned the nation will go commando rather than pay the new exorbitant levy on butt cover-ups. Nicholas Nicholaides, 69, known on t...
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Fraud squad dawn raid on Head of IMF's Paris pad
Paris - The specialist gendarmerie national unit has had a damn good rummage among Christine Lagarde's smalls as it executed a search warrant on her Paris home. The former French finance minister is under suspicion of hoarding excessive amounts of...
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Budget Bail Out for Britain
In a surprise announcement the Chancellor has announced that Britain's bail out has been agreed with the Russians. 'It was the Russians or bankruptcy' Osborne revealed to a shocked House of Commons. In exchange for the massive Russian bail out the...
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Ann Coulter Banned From Visiting Iowa
DES MOINES, Iowa - The state of Iowa has just issued a mandate which prohibits the Republican know-it-all, better known as Ann Coulter from ever setting foot in the state. The mandate came about as a direct result of Ann Coulter's recent statement...
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Nina Dobrev Agrees To Appear In a Nude Vampire-Themed Calendar
LOS ANGELES - Hollywood Innuendo has just announced that the star of The Vampire Diaries Nina Dobrev has agreed to appear in a nude vampire themed calendar. HI's Fajita San Guacamole stated that Cy Cyfellini, the director of operations for the Cal...
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Blake Shelton: I Ain't Divorcing Miranda - Hell She'd Shoot Me!
NASHVILLE - One of country music's happiest couples, Blake Shelton and Miranda "Itty Bitty" Lambert are laughing silly at the Big D rumors. According to an inside source, Shelton is supposed to be involved in a semi-affair with Tom Cruise's ex-wif...
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Doesn't Jack Nicholson Know He Looks Silly Hitting On Young Hollywood Starlets?
LOS ANGELES - Noted West Coast attorney Ginger Allred told Bedroom Pillow Talk that 75-year-old Jack Nicholson looks silly as hell flirting with young Hollywood starlets. Allred said that the Easy Rider actor seems to forget that he's close to 80...
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