Written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 20 March 2013

Nicosia - A Cyprus psychic whose visions interpret supernatural omens by staring intently at expensive underwear has warned the nation will go commando rather than pay the new exorbitant levy on butt cover-ups.

Nicholas Nicholaides, 69, known on the Island as the 'Knicker Seer', says a previous EU bailout on lycra leggings and push-up brassieres achieved nothing.

"I say Cyprus women were revolting back in '69, peeps," the soothsayer commented, "furious at a Common Market sales tax on underwired bras and stuff.

"The resulting slump was a national embarrassment and abandoned
our womenfolk without any proper support."

A balmy local climate means little excessive clothing is required from March to December with residents strolling partially clothed in searing daytime temperatures.

But a chilling recession has seen their government swoop down on bank account savings leading to a massive national outcry about daylight robbery.

The price of a bottle of Retsina has recently doubled to 40 Euros plus a 95% 'inebriation tax'.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Underwear, Cyprus




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