That's the Way the Crackers Crumble
After Rachel Jeantel's recent testimony in the trial of George Zimmerman, a lot of white people are suddenly wondering out loud why it's o.k. to call white people 'crackers,' while other racial epithets are out of bounds. Prominent blacks are being...
Read full storyJoe Biden asks Ecuador if Edward Snowden lunatic asylum ready
Washington DC - US Vice President Biden has phoned President Rafael Correa to ask him about stuff in the Edward Snowden case. "As you know, President Correa," Veep Joe explained to the baffled Ecuadorean leader, "with President Barack Obama curren...
Read full storyAiding and Abetting at Sheremetyevo Airport Part 2
Hello again, Pepe Warezabar for The Guard Dog covering the action at Sheremetyevo Airport. First, I want to thank all the tweets recommending the GGSR program (the Glenn Greenwald Spine-Building for Reporters program). I have acquired it and am already into it. But let's get up to date on high drama at this airport just this afternoon as we reporters swirled around in here and seemed to be...
Read full storyA Bad-Ass Review Of How Bad Dave Barry's 'Book of Bad Songs' Is.
Dave Barry wrote a book about bad songs. Fully 2/3rds of the songs he writes about are songs that I love. Dave Barry is now on my excrement list. First off, let me explain who Dave Barry is. Dave Barry is a comic god. Not a comic genius. Not a comic professional. Not a comic expert. A comic god. Let's get that straight right from the beginning. I know he looks pretty geeky for someone...
Read full storyHull City Warned By Steve Bruce About Complacency
Hull City boss Steve Bruce has warned his players not to be complacent after they were pitched against Chelsea on the opening day of the new Premier League season. Bruce told his team that they should be wary, and exercise a degree of caution when...
Read full storyBizarre Alien Civilization Actually Likes Telemarketers
WASHINGTON, D.C. At a press conference yesterday,astronomer Dr. Stella Nightley (Ph.D, THC, LSD) announced that her team had discovered a new planet forty light-years from Earth. Thanks to the unprecedented power of the revolutionary new telescope a...
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