Grocery clerks privately admit they don't really care if you found everything you needed or not
It's a question asked every time you go through a supermarket checkout line. "Did you find everything you were looking for?" But at a news conference today, a veteran grocery checkout clerk revealed that he and other checkers don't really care if y...
Read full storyRepublicans Threaten to Shut down the Government and Replace NFL Football with Shuffleboard
Like a crazed lumberjack on a 10 day drunken spree holding a axe to a felled tree and threatening to chop off its branches if he doesn't get what he desires, the Republicans of the US Congress have told President Obama they will not only shut down th...
Read full storyPrison Overcrowding Solution Creates Controversy in Alabama
With prisons and jails full to bursting point the state of Alabama has come up with a novel way of releasing criminals back into society earlier than their initial sentences demanded. While not classed as parole the idea, the brainchild of The Ala...
Read full storyOprah extracts the truth out of Lance Armstrong; "it was that damn bum cream" he claims
Oprah Winfrey has interviewed Lance Armstrong in a 2 hour session that is due to be sent out on US TV in two parts. Oprah took on the assignment because behind the Armstrong charade she believed there is a real person sitting on his saddle and not a...
Read full storyNASA blow-up dolls for inflatable space station module
Pasadena, Ca - "Just a couple of big breaths should get these babes going," the head of NASA's Jet Convulsion Laboratory said today, "so long as you don't have an allergy to rubber or speak with a lithp - er...lisp!" News of the delivery was welco...
Read full storyBig Show on Sunday: Patriots-Ravens or Downton Abbey?
Believe it or not: there are tickets available for the daunting and vaunted Ravens-Patriots match on Sunday for the AFC championship- likely because New Englanders love PBS Masterpiece Classics. Perhaps several thousand tickets flounder at the box...
Read full storyQueensland left with no choice to but to lure Sharks with Human bait
In a dramatic turn of events, it was revealed by the Queensland fisheries minister yesterday, that the state government is to use dying children and the aged attached to drumlines in order to lure and trap man-eating Great White sharks. The mini...
Read full storyThe Belichick 'Address' Trumps the Raven 'Nevermore'
Edgar Allen Poe left Boston and moved to Baltimore. If you believe in tracing rivalries to their source, we have the root in our grasp. The Ravens may claim that the AFC game will nevermore allow a Patriot victory-as Brendon Ayanbadejo plays t...
Read full storyNASA Purchases Inflatable Room for Use in Space: What's It For?
As soon as spoof science reporter Gail Farrelly read the article, "International Space Station Will Get First Inflatable Addition" in Florida Today, she launched an investigation into this very unusual contract deal. She'd like to find out how the a...
Read full storyIowa Bans Tongue Wrestling
DES MOINES - The senate of the state of Iowa has finally passed a bill that was first proposed two months ago. State Senator Claudette Cora Wonderwillow, 53, of Sioux City, introduced the bill which is listed as TW Bill 01 (Tongue Wrestling Bill 0...
Read full storyJennifer Aniston Admits She Still Pines For Brad Pitt
MARINA DEL REY, California - Jennifer Aniston recently stated that lately she has found herself on the moody side and feels that her biological clock is ticking at double time. The 43-year-old actress who is engaged to Justin Theroux, 41, remarked...
Read full storyMark Sanchez and Tim Tebow Could Both Be Going To The Washington Redskins
NEW YORK CITY - Word coming out of the New York Jets front office is that there is a deal in the works that would send quarterbacks Mark Sanchez and Tim Tebow to the Redskins for Kirk Cousins. An inside source who would only give his initials - P.
Read full storyBroncos Lose To The Ravens 38-35 In Overtime - The Tim Tebow Curse Got 'Em!
DENVER - There were some snow flurries and the temperature was 6 degrees but Baltimore Raven's kicker Justin Tucker's foot was hot as he nailed a 47-yard field goal in overtime to stop Peyton Manning's Denver Broncos dead in their tracks 38-35. Sp...
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