James Cameron budget skyrockets to $1.8 billion
James Cameron has been given the green light from Fox to begin principle photography for his new feature film Avatar.Read full story
Amazing Bush Confession: I Have the Heart, Cheney the Brain of a Tyrant
WASHINGTON - President Bush made a strange confession to a pool of reporters in the Oval Office yesterday during a photo session with Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki,.Read full story
Britney Spears suspect in terroristic assault on world loved icon
Honolulu, Hawaii - At 6:20 yesterday morning a 26 year old hiker, Ms. Ono Sushi of Pearl City, was walking up along the crater and noticed the heavy stench of tuna fish. As she approached the rim of the crater a horrifying sight met her eyes. The imp...Read full story
Gin-Fueled Queen Mum Returns to Life In Strange New Chassis
LONDON - The Queen Mother has returned to life, taking the form of a small, hybrid motorcar, Prince Charles revealed today.Read full story
Woolworths souvenir factory paying paps to snap Kate Middleton
London - (Ass Mess): Still reeling from disastrous Xmas trading figures and stung by criticism of their excruciatingly embarrassing 'royal engagement' souvenir mugs, high street rubbish peddler Woolworths has hired over one hundred paparazzi...Read full story
Somalia claims bombardment damages from USA
The successful aerial bombing in southern Somalia by the United States Airforce in a special operation designed to destroy and expel Al-Qaeda operatives in the southern region enclave of the horn of Africa has resulted into diplomatic deadlock betwee...Read full story
The Blue Blue Grass Of Home?
If you are anything like me you'll have most probably thought that grass is green but think again, because according to a boffin it is in fact blue!...Read full story
Prince Charles Transformed Radically By Sojourn in French Mental Hospital
LONDON - Prince Charles underwent a dramatic mental and physical transformation during a month at a sanatorium in Arles, France, Buckingham Palace announced today.Read full story
Apple Drives Straight into the Car Industry
After all the hoop-la surrounding Apple's announcement yesterday about the introduction of the iPhone, the computer giant has today unveiled the prototype for their iCar.Read full story
Big Brother housemate Jake Tweed is not a mute
Hertfordshire (England) - Concerns have been pouring in from the viewing public, to the producers of Celebrity Big Brother (CBB) for the lack of speech from Jack Tweed, boyfriend of Jade Goody.Read full story
Bush to be 'milked' for war effort
The US Senate last night announced plans to inseminate the young women of America with 'super sperm' in order to maintain a fighting force in Iraq.Read full story
David Beckham and Gordon Ramsey are brothers?
London - (Ass Mess): The UK's National Poisons Unit has confirmed DNA findings that name Tory politician and Hellfire Club grandee Stephen Norris as the father of both former England football team captain David Beckham and fowl-mouthed self publi...Read full story
Whore on Terra: Thought Police launch new mind reading machine
California - (Ass Mess): The Whore Against Terra took yet another sinister twist today with the launch of a new NASA satellite capable of reading the thoughts and intentions of all Iraqi citizens living within a 200 mile radius of Baghdad.Read full story
The Moon Is A Spoof
Moon lovers & spacemen all over the world today were in deep shock when Scientists proved the moon is, in fact, not real.Read full story
Woman HARASSES Man
"Women's Equality" and "United We Stand" are two well-known phrases that are being put to the test in the courts in the land of Texas.Read full story
Britain Reaches For The Stars
The British Space Agency yesterday unveiled plans for a manned British expedition to the Moon by the end of 2010.Read full story
Is Jamie Burning The Candle At Both Ends?
Celebrity Chef, Jamie Oliver, is today denying that his manic lifestyle is taking its toll on him.Read full story
George Michael: "Drugged up? Me? No Way"
George Michael has denied claims he was drugged up at the wheel of his car again last night.Read full story
Howard Stern writers to lead San Francisco Gay Parade.
Jan 10 2007, The Boys into Girls Association announced Richard Christy and Sal the Stockbroker, writers of the Howard Stern Show, as the Grand Marshals of the San Francisco gay pride parade today.Read full story
New Diana Evidence Turns Up
PARIS: There was a startling new twist in the Princess Diana Murder Inquiry today as two new witnesses came forward to give evidence. The two, who cannot be named, because they are French and nobody can pronounce their names properly, have differe...Read full story
Faculty at S.M.U. Voices Concern About Bush Library
Southern Methodist University professors are protesting the building of the George W Bush Presidential Library on their campus.Dean John Wayne Crockett led the fight : "We , Southern Methodists differentiated ourselves from the Methodist Church...Read full story
Britney Loses "Worst Dressed" Crown Due to Tasteful Attire Incident
Less than 24 hours after being crowned the "Worst Dressed" woman in America, Britney Spears has been stripped of her crown due to an incident last summer. Fashion designer Mr. Blackwell initially put Spears at the top of his 47th annual &q...Read full story
Cashman Ministers to Bereaved Randy
The NYTimes reports :"Out of a genuine condolence call, and genuine concern, Brian (Cashman) asked Randy if he could reach out to a couple of clubs closer to home, and Randy said he could do that, and that led us to where we are today," sai...Read full story
Help Us Play Plead NYC Children!
In an unusual public-private partnership, the city is developing a playground near the South Street Seaport that will have trained "play workers" on hand to help children interact with features of the new playground: water, ramps, sand...Read full story