J.J.'s Confession - I Was Aristide's Body Double
Los Angelos, CA - Jimmy Walker, once known the World over as "J.J." on the 70s hit TV series Good Times has confessed that he has been acting as a secret body double for former Haitian ruler Jean-Bertand Aristide.
Read full storyDefeat the Reaper: If Bill and Ted Could Do It...
I don't know about you, but as I get older, I get closer to death. This makes me wonder, with all of our technology and so-called smarts, why can't we find a cure for death? How come no one, except for Michael Jackson and Bill and Ted, has tried? I mean we are all smarter than Bill and Ted, separately, but maybe not combined. We are also not as freaky as MJ, right?We should be able...
Read full storyMcDonald's Didn't Make Me Fat: New Lawsuit Filed
A young man tried to get really fat by eating McDonald's food. He thought it would work so he wouldn't have to.
Read full storyWorst Dressed at 2004 Oscars
Hollywood, CA Thanks to all the responses of our best dressed poll, Jean Valjean Luc Picard, the creator of Les Miserables Enterprise Wear
Read full storyJury Selection Halted for Scott Peterson
Modesto, CA. - Defense attorneys have asked that jury selection be halted amidst difficulties finding anyone sympathetic to Scott Peterson.
Read full storyBird Holds Man's Eyeball Hostage
FORT MYERS, Florida (FP) -- A pet parrot has stolen its owners fake eye and is holding it hostage. The bird, whose name is Colonel Bubby, is a Military Macaw (ara militaris) who is demanding changes in living conditions and claims that the prosthetic...
Read full storyKARL ROVER the next generation
Just in time for the final showdown in November NASA has newly equipped their Karl Rover Election Assistance Vehicle to win the war on the American votes. Some of its most effective features are:...
Read full storyRoyals Aghast Over Queens Gas
LONDON, ENGLAND - Sources close to the Royal family report the Queen has acquired a very unpleasant habit. "She indiscrimately spews intestinal gas at the most inappropriate moments". "She sound likes she's on the ‘throne' even when she isn't". Every...
Read full storyNew Eastwood Film: Lord of the Magnum: The Return of Dirty Harry
Hollywood, CA- Filming for the next installment of Eastwood's long-running franchise of the "Dirty Harry" movies has started today. The tentative title of the film, an expected blockbuster at the box-office, is "Lord of the Magnu...
Read full storyWar In Oregon
SALEM, OR- Gay marriage is spreading at a rampant rate, derived by the ordeal in San Francisco last week. Wednesday gay marriage has embedded it's self into the Californian neighbor to the north, Oregon. But how to halt such a title wave; use force...
Read full storyBush Releases Campaign Ads
Washington, DC--Now that the Democrats have finally selected a presidential candidate, President George Bush's campaign released a series of television ads this week. The ads focus on Bush's leadership during "difficult times" yet oddly conta...
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