"Look, this is the way I feed my kids," cries Mistress Alahna, who clearly didn't pay attention in high school. "How am I going to meet up with men who pay me to tug on their junk?" Much to the chagrin to Comic-con season ticket holders, apartment...
"Want to have a good time old boy?" was their opening line every single time a granny went along the bars along the beach in Haskins, Florida, a small village near the Gulf Coast. It was delivered by a well-dressed 69-87 year-old with white hair and...
The recession in Las Vegas and Reno, Nevado has hit not only the casinos but the world's oldest profession extremely hard. To drum up business a bit more, prostitutes are now offering quickies at bargain prices. The same thing has happened in most...
I'm sure you're surprised to see me here, but are you any more surprised than I am to see you here? What kind of a boy did I raise that he would end up in this house of ill repute on a Saturday night with his roughhousing friends? Haven't I always said they were bad influences on you? Now I have proof positive. And is that alcohol I smell on your breath? As for what I'm dong here, I'm tempted t...
It has emerged today that a number of NHS Primary Care Trusts are regularly recommending the use of prostitutes in cases involving certain types of sexual dysfunction. Recent figures issued by Dorset Primary Care Trust, disclosed that over £327,00...
France's hopes of becoming the World Cup champions were dashed yet a third straight time as they were beaten squarely by South Africa with a final score of 2 to 1. Although the win wasn't enough to keep South Africa in the games, the bigger story is...
Kristin Davis, the actress from Sex and the City, today endorsed her namesake Kristin Davis (aka The Manhattan Madam) in the NY race for Governor. Madam Davis is running an outsider campaign promising to legalize marijuana and prostitution. Th...
While Catholic leadership struggles to cling to what might be left of their tepid public image, a new scandal involving the recruitment and indoctrination of transvestite prostitutes into the Sisterhood has shocked the entire world, except San Franci...
FACT: The last person to give a s-it about Little Orphan Annie died in 1977. 86 years after the first time her pupil-less eyes were published, the bitch got fired. In her final appearance today, printed in something called a "newspaper", which, ap...
We all know it isn't black men. Even though they are the but of jokes, it turns out that it isn't Japanese men. It also isn't tribal pygmies. A survey of prostitutes in fifteen cities around the world reveals that it is Arabic men who have the w...
A Labour MP who was only returned to the Commons in the general election earlier this month is to face prosecution over his Parliamentary expenses, made at taxpayer expense. Eric Illsley faces three charges under the Theft Act on suspicion of dis...
Bedfordshire police have been humiliated after the owner of bungalow in Chalton Heights was cleared of running a brothel from the property. An investigation into the goings-on at the property was initiated after adverts appeared in local newspape...
Denise "Honey Sugar" Stark was arrested on her usual corner last night at the intersection of Third and Elm. This time, however, she was charged with more than just the usual solicitation. The normally flat chested Denise, who was captured wearing...
Extending their campaign of hate against heterosexuals, Jacqui Smith announced that the 'users' of sexual services would be targeted and not the 'dealers'. Ms Smith said,"As part of our campaign to get as many men with criminal records as possible...
In an unprecedented move the US Congress passed a uniform bicameral law that is waiting for President Obamas' signature. House Bill 14288 and Senate Bill 2 match each other in verbiage, as the respective bodies want this legislation passed pronto.
With an unprecedented and historic display of unity the House and Senate voted unanimously in favor of President Obama's sweeping Health Care reform that will cost just under a trillion dollars and guaranteed to reduce the deficit 100 billion 'someti...
INTERCOURSE, Pennsylvania - The Bravisimo Network has just announced that it has cancelled one of their highest rated reality shows, The Real Housewives of Intercourse, Pennsylvania. An executive with the network Terence Stipplemuck said that he w...
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