Prostitutes Hit Hard By Inflation, Offers Special 'Quicky' Rates

Funny story written by Bureau

Wednesday, 25 August 2010

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The recession in Las Vegas and Reno, Nevado has hit not only the casinos but the world's oldest profession extremely hard. To drum up business a bit more, prostitutes are now offering quickies at bargain prices.

The same thing has happened in most big cities across the United States.

Alongside the street corner where the girls hang out are Port-A-Johns that fold out into small private cells that they offer you to "negotiate".

"So far, I haven't had any refusals to go into those. Sometimes we head back to a motel and sometimes we just negotiate on the spot."

"We had to invent something different because people don't have the money they had before and clients are becoming rare compared to how it was here a couple years ago," says an unnamed sex procurer or pimp in New York.

Back on the street in front of her Port-A-Johns we talked to Merry Mary about the upside and downside of the new fold-outs.

"They have increased business but every once in awhile, you'll be gone and some drunk will crap in it. So we scoop it and move it over to another spot."

However, all agreed on one thing, the inflation is killing them.

"Our average customer weighs 40 pounds more than just 10 years ago", stated Merry Mary. "I personally refuse at 350 pounds."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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