Reacting to alarmist reports that the Isle of Man, sometimes pronounced Mull, had been stolen, several prominent inhabitants of the island have written to the Spoof to assure a worried public that they have not been stolen, they have been bought!...
The Isle of Mull, home to the Mull of Kintyre (made famous by Paul McCartney's dirge) and Tobomory (which gained fame as the children's TV show Balamory), has been stolen. The first anybody knew of the theft was when the SatNav on the Mull Ferry a...
"Make a long arm and consult Bradshaw, Flotsam!" My friend Shylock Humes sat hunched in his armchair like a broken-backed black beetle smoking his 'thinking pipe'. Why he wanted an armchair shaped like a pipe-smoking beetle was beyond me. At least I could rely on good old Bradshaw. "You need the 5:30 express from Victoria, Humes, as far as Littlehampton. Then take the 9:15 Rottingdean sleepe...
In a story which has been developing since late summer, local bicycle thieves have been on a very successful route around an American city, stealing as many bicycles as they can get away with. Their main targets are bicycles which are secured with...
The case against J.K.Rowling in Edinburgh's Criminal Court for shoplifting went ahead yesterday. Woolworth's representative Lionel Peasbody gave testimony to the effect that he saw a lady wearing a long black cloak, pointed boots and tall peake...
LAS VEGAS - The Assistant Director of Casino Chips for the Bellagio Resort Gambling Casino, Sinclair Vindercullen, has informed The Tinsel Town Times Tribune that his casino was robbed of $1.5 million in casino chips. Vindercullen stated, that he...
Yes, 'cheeky burglars' abound in part of England. So far they have struck four times. Each time they have made a "clean" getaway. Police are said to be looking for three 'squeaky-clean' men in their early 20s, according to forensic expert, Luk...
Mass horror in Cornwall today as what has been described as the "Anti-Santa" was witnessed stealing presents from homes in Worsley Dorsley. Mrs. Elena Morris woke up this morning and discovered a leering fat man dressed in green with a lethal sack...
Many people have asked themselves where has the time gone, and wondered why there does not seem to be enough hours in the day. After a three year investigation by the temporal branch of Scotland Yard it looks like an answer to both questions has...
French tea leaf Pierre Le Guennec is in more trouble after police found a stash of TV artist Tony Hart's early sketches. In a dawn raid today, French police stormed the former alarm peddlers gaff after an anonymous tip off. Some of the pictures are...
A UK housewife, described by neighbours as being 'sexually frustrated' today related how she was driven into a sexual frenzy of wanton perverted lust when she was 'taken every which way and then some' by a well endowed burglar. In broad daylight.
BIRMINGHAM - Two youths were found guilty by the City of Birmingham Magistrates' Court for stealing large poppies from lampposts on Broad Street, and selling them to innocent passers-by. The people also involved in disrupting the 2-minute silence...
New Jerseyans are scratching their heads over the story about two idiots; a woman who lost a backpack full of cash and jewels, and the moron who found and returned it. Joseph Monto, a 33-year-old mechanic and certified dumbass, spotted a backpack...
Geneva, Switzerland - Swiss scientist monitoring new sophisticated seismograph equipment originally produced in America but illegally and cheaply reproduced in China for half price have been recording strange Earth vibrations for months. The adva...
London UK: Scotland Yard is reporting that two women forced their way into the editorial offices of The Spoof, tying up the administrator named Mark. The thieves then made off with dossiers of all the spoof writers. The administrator described the...
A Wisconsin man opened up a local bank's ATM with a can opener, pulled out the cash and put it on the ground and then rode away with the ATM on the back of his pickup truck. "I was shocked when I saw it on the security video", said the bank manage...
Pope Benedict XVIIIMD has returned to Vatican City in the centre of Rome after a successful four day trip to the UK, however Scotland Yard in the UK are left wondering what happened to several important items including art-works, the Crown Jewels and...
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