Evidence obtained under torture cannot be used in China's courts, the government has said, weeks after a convicted murderer was set free because his victim turned out to be less dead than previously supposed. Laws banning torture are in place, bu...
MI5 have come under scrutiny today as it has emerged the secret service have been using the threat of making people complete DIY tasks as part of their interrogation process. The story came to light due to the claim of a yet undisclosed source rec...
Apple Computer has filed suit against Alex Jones over his famous Youtube video showing him torturing an iPad to death. The ten-minute piece shows various interrogation methods used by the US Military - with the support and blessing of every other...
Pope Benedict XVI is once again having to fight off criticism after information was 'leaked' implicating the Church in prisoner torture at a secret Baghdad jail. The jail, a former Catholic boarding school, had come under scrutiny by Human Rights...
GUANTANIMO BAY, CUBA -- The Obama Administration has announced the closing of Camp X-Ray and the opening of a new, cutting edge prison for the detaining, interrogation, and disciplining of terrorists and other petulant monkeys. The facility is cal...
An unfortunate typing error led to an Ohio woman enduring an hour-long ordeal of torture by a man she met online. The man, Gerald Smarts, who claims to work for the CIA, said that he thought it was what she wanted. The woman, who asked not to be...
A secret torture chamber has been discovered at the Prime Minister's place of residence and business, number 10 Downing Street. The room was discovered by a delivery boy from a chocolate company who was there to deliver the weekly truckload of Kit...
The Metropolitan Police are investigating claims that men were routinely tortured by the furniture retailer MFI. Information was passed to the Met by a former employee, Mr Stig O'Treacy, who told police that he had witnessed men being sideboarded at...
The capture of top Afghan Taliban leader Mullah Baradar by U.S. military units has been a mixed blessing. While the Obama administration (in between planning to collect the next Nobel Peace Prize) has hailed it as a success and a blow to the "tiny ti...
Washington, D.C. - Democrats in the senate broke out in shouts of joy, having succeeded in garnering the 60 votes needed to pass the Healthcare Reform bill. 'We had to use some less than friendly persuasion to get the votes, but the ends justify t...
His Underground Lair, Remote Island - Dick Cheney, former Vice President of the U.S., director of Halliburton and advisor to Lucifer, has recently released a statement in which he expresses regret over Gitmo, and calls for it's closing. "I have ju...
The CIA (The real one not Jagged's own CIA alias Cockroach infiltration army) have been globally condemned for their inhumane torture tactics! Now Jaggedone thought about this and immediately sent his own CIA (see above!) out to those nations comp...
All the competing democracies have now selected and announced their Waterboarding teams. With a history stretching back to the Pol Pot regime in post-Vietnam Kampuchea and perfected by a number of countries since, Waterboarding is about to become...
In a shock move designed to stun the world of football, Man United today announced that they would be leading participants in a really crappy money-making scheme. Alongside the London Dungeon, and the Eden Project, Man United will be offering "ded...
Former President of Vice Dick Cheney is trying to combine two of his favorite hobbies into a new, passionate political platform- gun shooting and torture. Already outspoken at the attempted outlawing of one of his favorite pastimes- tormenting fe...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a move historically consistent with Republican tactics, Republicans told House Speaker Nancy Pelosi today that she either needs to confess what she knows about water boarding, or face having a confession forced out of her by one...
(Washington, D.C.) The debate between former Vice President Dick Cheney and current President Barack Obama over United States policy on detainees at Guanatanamo Bay, which has been intensifying over the last month, shows no sign of diminishing. The l...
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