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Funny satire stories about Chelsea

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Funny story: Carlo Ancelotti Sacked!

Carlo Ancelotti Sacked!

The world of football was reeling this morning after Chelsea announced that they had sacked manager Carlo Ancelotti immediately after last night's crushing 3-1 defeat against Arsenal at the Emirates. Ancelotti only took charge of the Blues in summ...

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Funny story: Joe Cole Receives Second Red Card In A Week - For Speeding!

Joe Cole Receives Second Red Card In A Week - For Speeding!

Joe Cole, the Liverpool and England footballer who was sent off in his very first competitive game for the Reds against Arsenal at the weekend, has come a cropper for the second time in a week, when he was given a second red card - for speeding! C...

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Funny story: Blackpool FC Move Into Champions League Spot

Blackpool FC Move Into Champions League Spot

Premier League newboys Blackpool clearly stated their intentions at the weekend when they crushed a limp-wristed Wigan Athletic 4-0 in their opening match of the campaign, and, in so doing, put themselves in a great position to claim a Champions Leag...

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Funny story: West Brom To Field Two Goalkeepers Against Chelsea

West Brom To Field Two Goalkeepers Against Chelsea

As football supporters prepare themselves for the Premier League kick off next Saturday, top flight newboys, West Bromwich Albion are facing up to their tricky away game against Chelsea at Stamford Bridge with renewed optimism, as it was announced th...

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Funny story: Brown: Title Has Slipped Away

Brown: Title Has Slipped Away

Gordon Brown, manager of the Red Devils, has admitted that it looks as though the title will be going to the Blues of West London. A series of poor performances have left the legendary Scottish manager needing a miracle. "The Blues are in the dri...

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Funny story: Ashley Cole Reports Someone Has Broken Into His Home

Ashley Cole Reports Someone Has Broken Into His Home

LONDON - Chelsea football star and womanizing twit, Ashley Cole has told the local authorities that someone broke into his mansion in Godalming while he was out trying to buy something nice for his his wife Cheryl in hopes that she gives him a third,...

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Funny story: 'Ashley Cole Is Not Losing It' Says John Terry

'Ashley Cole Is Not Losing It' Says John Terry

Reports that Chelsea and England full back Ashley Cole has had a psychiatrist visit as he recuperates from his broken ankle in France do not necessarily signify that he is losing his mind. So says a written statement, allegedly penned by Chelsea c...

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Funny story: Guus Hiddink Just Can't Make His Mind Up!

Guus Hiddink Just Can't Make His Mind Up!

Guus Hiddink, the former De Graafschap, PSV Eindhoven (twice), Fenerbahçe, Valencia, Holland, Real Madrid, Real Betis, South Korea, Australia and Chelsea manager who is presently the manager of Russia until his current contract expires, and who has s...

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Funny story: Stamford Bridge Toppled By Wayne Bridge

Stamford Bridge Toppled By Wayne Bridge

Manchester City star Wayne Bridge humbled his namesake Stamford Bridge yesterday afternoon in his side's famous 4-2 victory which keeps the Sky Blues in fourth place in the Premier League. Bridge, the recent subject of the Terrygate Affair, rubbed...

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Funny story: Ashley Cole's Mum Wants Cheryl To Forgive Little Ashley For His Being Seduced By Half A Dozen "Fans"

Ashley Cole's Mum Wants Cheryl To Forgive Little Ashley For His Being Seduced By Half A Dozen "Fans"

LONDON - One has to hand it to Ashley Cole, err on second thought lets make that one has to admire the Chelsea chap for pulling out all of the stops in trying to salvage his marriage to his wife the "Pond Hopping" Cheryl Cole (Hough?). Ashley, or...

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Funny story: Manchester City and Arsenal Both Want Vanessa Perroncel

Manchester City and Arsenal Both Want Vanessa Perroncel

As the alleged John Terry Scandal rages on allegedly unabated in the alleged daily tabloids, attention turned this morning to the alleged lady at the centre of the alleged row, Vanessa Perroncel, with both Manchester City and Arsenal allegedly declar...

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Funny story: John Terry Banned From Everywhere

John Terry Banned From Everywhere

Poor old JT, as his few remaining friends call him. John Terry, Chelsea and England football captain was today left reeling as the hate campaign against him gathers momentum. Calls have been made for JT to be stripped of the England captaincy foll...

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Funny story: "Chase Me!" Says Didier Drogba

"Chase Me!" Says Didier Drogba

Bizarre behaviour being reported from Stamford Bridge as Didier Drogba nets the winner against Hull City, as an attempted cross looped over the goalkeeper into the net. As Drogba wheeled away from the goal, he invited team mates to chase him. Exhi...

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Funny story: Britain's Got Talent Susan Boyle To Sing Before FA Cup Final

Britain's Got Talent Susan Boyle To Sing Before FA Cup Final

After her stunning recent entrance onto the world singing stage, and last weekend's qualification for its final, Britain's Got Talent star Susan Boyle is set to reach an even wider audience after being invited to sing the national anthem at Wembley S...

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Funny story: Drogba charges UEFA referee with insulting him

Drogba charges UEFA referee with insulting him

Chelsea striker Dider Drogba today charged UEFA referee Tom Not-Fooledby Divingsson with insulting him during the Champions League match against Barcelona. Disciplinary proceedings have also been taken by the player against the Metropolitan Police...

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Funny story: Didier Drogba Banned For Fifteen Matches!

Didier Drogba Banned For Fifteen Matches!

Didier Drogba, the Chelsea striker who so shamefully remonstrated with Norwegian referee, Tom Henning Ovrebo, after Wednesday night's Champions League semi-final clash with Barcelona at Stamford Bridge, has received a massive 15-match Abuse Ban from...

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Funny story: Kinnear in frame for Chelsea job

Kinnear in frame for Chelsea job

Newcastle manager Joe Kinnear is on the Chelsea wish list to replace Luiz Felipe Scolari. Sky News reports the Newcastle manager's recent hospitalisation has been a cloak so he could start negotiations with Stamford Bridge. A Chelsea spokesman...

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