The following testimony is one man's incredible story of how he was cured of chronic back pain by an animal. As the facts unfold, they will appear to be fictional in nature, however, the author has signed a written affidavit and has also agreed to submit to a lie detector test upon request. My name is Ben Malo and I am an ancient history enthusiast. In my spare time, I read anything that I can...
The Met Office has today issued a severe health warning as parts of the UK are set to see the mercury rise to a sultry 58 degrees Fahrenheit. The 400 page leaflet was produced amid growing concerns that a staggering 96% of British people fail to r...
A freelance engineer by the name of Tommy Lardas has revolutionized the physical fitness industry with his Cycle Ab Builder. This incredible new device combines the mobility of a bicycle with the power crunching physical exercise of sit-ups. Tommy Lardas had this to say about his revolutionary, mobile piece of gym equipment. "I have always enjoyed riding my bicycle, not only is it non-poll...
The government is finally to get tough on greedy, lazy children after years of useless guidance and advice. "You can lecture an 8yr old about healthy eating until you are blue in the face but it won't stop them wanting fried chicken or sweets. Th...
The medical community was rocked last night by the research findings of the University of Lamebridge regarding human health disorders. The studies were conducted over a 20 year period, involving over one million participants. The findings could r...
The National Audit Office has today published grim statistics confirming that life expectancy is lowest in the most deprived areas of the UK. The report has found that the average man will DEFINITELY die at 75.8 years old with women faring little...
Research done by the Manufacturers of the household disinfectant De-tox the very famous Lever Brothers, has discovered that there are a hundred times more bacteria on your kitchen worktop than there are on a toilet seat! The advice by the company...
For some reason, the World Health Organization has checked and rechecked their numbers and they have concluded that England has the highest percentage of heart attack victims in the world with the United States coming in a close second. "So far we...
Millions of health conscious Britons awoke this morning to hear that the health benefits of drinking water may have been over exaggerated A ten year study has concluded that the Great British Cuppa may actually be better for you than water. The re...
Researchers at the William Jefferson Clinton Hot Sex Clinic at the University of Wasilla, measured a minute hormone secretion (AMH) in (666) attractive women, ranging in age from 15 to 46. (AMH) or anti-mullerian hormone has previously been identifie...
Researchers in Britain have announced that they will soon be ready to make lungs 'to order'. Patients, instead of waiting on extremely long 'donor lists' hoping and praying for someone to die, so that they may live, will no longer have to wrestle wi...
Scientists have discovered that women actually need sex rather than 'want intimacy'. The breakthrough was made by NASA scientists, who rejoiced in the possibilities this could bring. "I feel like I haven't done my duty - I'm going to a night cl...
Scientists and Medical Researchers around the world are putting their heads together and exchanging more than head lice. Studies are constantly being carried out to help us all live longer, happier and more productive lives. Here are some recent findings published in a UK National Newspaper. * Four cups of coffee a day 'reduces risk of oral cancer' BUT * Drinking more than four cups o...
Hollywood CA: Emergency Medical Technicians (EMT) responded to a 911 call about a man found laying unconscious at the corner of Hollywood Boulevard and Vine Street. He was transported, via ambulance to nearby Hollywood General Hospital. Hospital...
It has been announced that 'hosptial care will continue when you get home'. Details were not published along with this vague headline. Reporter, Lady G., decided to do some snooping behind this controversial headline and this is what she discovered: 1) Hospital care WILL continue - i.e. Nurses and Doctors who 'cared' for you will continue to think about you from time to time, when they...
A regular customer of the local Trader Joe's, known commonly among staff and fellow customers as "the Food Nazi," claimed to have been assaulted by another customer while shopping at the store on Saturday. "It's an outrage," snapped Holly Sheet, 3...
A study by the University of Aldershot led by Mark Lowton has shown that cannibals fed a Mediterranean diet were less likely to suffer coronary disease than those who stuck to their regular diet. Lowton says due to limited funding the study was ma...
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