It is a big day today for all the young students in Scotland. Exam fever has taken over as they begin their "Highers". That's not quite an "A" level but then Scotland always has to be different. Imagine thousands of nervous students opening their...
London - Weirdly photochopped pics of Boris Johnson aide Sir Simon 'Paradise Lost' Milton have appeared in British tabloids. The ex-Westmonster Council CEO died suddenly yesterday 'with the Mayor of London at his bedside' according to Daily Smeare...
A fresh crisis has hit the troubled coalition Government - an absence of new things to declare war on. Having successfully declared war on terrorism, crime, vandalism, MPs' expenses, old people, young people, babies and Libya the Press Office at Numb...
One day I was taking tea in my rooms when Sherlock Cameron strode in. "You have probably never thought seriously of Boris Moriarty?" said he. "Of course not, the man's like a loveable labrador." "Aye, there's the genius and the wonder of the thing!" he cried. "That man pervades London, and no one takes him seriously. That's what puts him on a pinnacle in the records of bumbling politici...
Boris Johnson is hoping to be able to revamp the capital's mobile phone network before the London Olympics in 2012. A generous Chinese phone technology giant has offered to install new receivers into the London Underground System so that for the f...
Ambitious Boris Johnson is hoping to be able to take advantage of Cameron's unpopularity and to succeed him if he faces a vote of no confidence. The blonde haired buffoon was taking Cameron's ideas for the Big Society and recycling them as his own...
Business news - and there have been spectacular falls on the National Treasures Index today, with Both Stephen Fry and Alan Davies closing down. Both stocks falling a unprecedented 10W (Whiteleys) as a result of off-colour jokes made about the Japane...
Boris Johnson, Mayor of London has set out on a 'collision course' with the Government. Boris has to face the electorate long before the Government and he wants expansion of airport capacity for London and the south east to be in his programme. Th...
The arrival of the large blue French cock on the North plinth at Trafalgar Square has not been greeted with unanimous approval from all the European leaders. In Brussels, Silvio Berlusconi paying a flying visit to have his shoe heels raised, grabb...
Cock of the north or a cock and bull story, it's all about Cocky Cameron and it's blue! What could be more British than a cockerel? Erm, a bulldog or even an Aberdeen Angus bull would seem appropriate. But, no, some daft eedjit has decided to have...
The Government has announced that dead people will have to pay VAT on the amount of time it takes them to decompose. In a final attempt to balance the books, every person that dies after Wednesday 5th April will pay a VAT accredited tax levy on th...
Mayor of London Boris Johnson has been labelled a killjoy for his insistence on all fireworks discharged over the weekend being anchored to ensure they land in the borough of origin. 'Cross borough' firework incidents were at an all time high last...
Mayor of London, Boris Johnson, is causing problems for the Government. By calling the policy of a removal of poor people from expensive flats in London 'ethnic cleansing', Boris is sounding like a member of the Labour Party. In characteristic fas...
Following an exhaustive investigation, Skoob News can finally reveal that the photographs displayed on the interweb of Prime Minister David Cameron, and London Mayor, Boris Johnson, giving Katie Price one up the arse are photoshopped fakes. Acting...
Boris Johnson told a shocked Conservative Party Conference today that the General Election must be declared void. To gasps of incredulity Boris said that if a majority of those entitled to vote did not vote for a particular party then there could...
Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, is quite a mouthful. Quite literally, if you are inclined to believe his own opinion as to why he is so successful with members of the opposite sex. 'Word has obviously got around about my enormous manly appenda...
It has been revealed that Mad Tory Mayor, Boris Johnson may be responsible for impregnating hundreds of women across the city of London in a bid to create a master race. Johnson, a product of German experimentation to produce a blonde haired, blue...
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